RIGHT THAT'S IT - HAD ENOUGH OF NON-EATING DS2 - HEEELLPPPP!!!

[Merlin]

So, yet again tonight I put a tasty dinner in from of him (homemade cottage pie and carrots) and yet again he refuses point blank to put even the tiniest amount in his mouth!!

This has been going on for weeks. We have tried chicken, fish, pasta - everything - and he just will not even taste a little bit! I have reduced his snacks in the day, tried all sorts of bribery etc and NOTHING works. He would quite happily eat pizza and chips every night if I let him or a sandwich.

A normal day's eating for him at mo consists of

Breakfast -cereal or toast and marmite, maybe a yog.

Lunch - marmite sandwich, apple, crisps, a biscuit or cake

Dinner - nothing! (unless it's pizza!)

I just don't know what else to do - apart from just carrying on dishing up the dinners and then throwing them away untouched .

Anyone got any suggestions or advice please?

Well, a bit further on in the month and THE EATING IS STILL TERRIBLE!!!

I have cut down on the snacks in the hope of making him hungrier but he is still refusing to eat anything at dinnertime other than pizza!

Would I be really mean if I refused all 'nice' things ie. biscuits, cakes etc? Just limit snacks to fruit, yoghurt etc.

I am at my wits end now ...... just don't know what to do.

bump

Is he getting full up on juice between meals? It might be more filling than you think.

Cut out all snacks between meals even if he is looking agonised and saying he is hungry. Serve up small portions of the foods you would like him to eat, that will look more manageable to him, for both lunch and tea and don't say much, apart from if he doesn't eat it "You haven't eaten your dinner, so no pudding this time" and just take it away without saying much if he doesn't eat it.

He might 'starve' for a few days but if he is hungry enough he will eat what he is given next time. He needs to learn that "this is what is for lunch/tea and there isn't anything else, you either eat this or you will get hungry". So long as it isn't really 'wacky' food or food that he really hates. If it is food he has eaten before but is now being stubborn about then that should be fine.

It might feel painful to stay strong and do this but will be worth it! Like controlled crying for sleeping! Painful for a few days but then worth it for a much easier life and happier child in the long run.

let him have the pizza 5 days out of seven. the other two days he has to at least taste what you serve. he wont get anything else if he wont eat it but he gets a bigger supper.

my dd lived and breathed pancakes for weeks but she had really bad eating problems i was afvised just to let her eat what she will

Hi Merlin.
Just wanted to say that my DS1 has been a very fussy eater since he was about 16 months old. He is nearly 5 now and still fussy!!!! He doesn't eat any fruit or veg unless its hidden in sauces etc.
I give him smoothies for his fruit intake.
What I'm trying to say is that you are not alone. I have been driven demented by this for years and it took me a long time to relax. Once I did relax DS did start to eat a little more (marginally) but still is very reluctant to try anything new.
My DS seems to use food as a method of control (iykwim) and therefore I didn't see any point in fighting him on it anymore.
I am happy that he eats enough during the day. It sounds to me like your DS eats quite a bit throughout the day and maybe he simply isn't hungry at dinner time.
Maybe cut back the afternoon snacks (for instance: nothing after 2pm until dinner)and maybe he will start to increase his appetite.
Warning: It is a very slow process.We poor mummies just have to perservere and keep calm. A cool glass of vino really does help

Thanks ladies.

Tracksuitlover - that is exactly what I have been doing for weeks and he just refuses everything other than pizza.

He won't even try it.

My DS is the same.
He refuses to try anything new. He does however eat quite a few different meals now but only because I have kept serving up different meals time and time and time and time again. The amount of food I have thrown into the bin and the amount of nights he has gone to bed without his dinner are countless.
I'm sorry I don't really have any other advice on how to get your DS to eat anything other than pizza. Just maybe keep serving up what everyone else is having. If he doesn't eat it, its his choice.
So much easier said than done eh!!!

Oh God, ds is appalling eater too.is just 3 but has gradually narrowed his tastes over the last 18months, with one food after another being rejected.

He doesn't eat hot food. Just wont.

He lives at the moment on what on the face of it is fairly healthy food, but food which just does not fit into OUR lives.

So, breakfast.

Usually eats a lot. Cereal, vitamins, brioche, croissant or something.

Lunch. NOt much. Will eat houmus, cucumber, carrot, cocktail sausages (sometimes, but going off them now). Breadsticks or plain bread. Sometimes toast and jam.

Supper. Grated cheese. Carrot stick. Yoghurt.

I am trying to increase his intake of veg. He will eat bananas and apples and grapes. Loves nutrigrain bars. Yoghurt coated (full of additives probably) fruit flakes.

Sooo. All in all not too bad though think lacking in iron (he has eczema and wonder if skin probs could relate to iron deficiency). But it means that every bloody night I make supper and he doesn't eat it. Have tried offering NOTHING but he doesn't buckle. He will not try new things. No way.

I loathe the way we have a kind of two tier eating system going on - he grazes while dd and we eat "normal" meals. And I kind of wonder how on earth we will get to a point when he will try other food. Perhaps one day there will be an epiphany. Who knows;

I know that in the general scheme of things and on paper, his food intake is not tooo bad. But but but, it is annoying. But am vowing to make nothing of it, to ignore and just let him be really.

Sorry - very long but it is so IRRITATING!

Very irritating yes I agree!!!!
It somehow helps though to know that there are other lo's that are the same.
I just keep remembering: -

If a child is hungry they will eat; they will never starve.

The food that we serve to our lo's is OUR responsibility; the food that they eat is THEIR responsilibity.

Pooka, that is EXACTLY how I feel.

Mine will eat a good breakfast - cereal or toast, croissant yog etc (not all at once!!)

Lunch - marmite sandwich, apple. Off all other fruit at mo.

Will happily eat all the sweet stuff if I let him - lol.

Then dinner - either another sandwich or pizza. Will not touch anything else - or even attempt to try it.

I am inclined to let him eat the pizza and try and sneak some 'extra' things on to it - but it feels like giving in really.

my son is also 5 and eats very badly.

He eats;
breakfast - cereal, porridge, bacon and eggs (that was a real achievment) or toast.

lunch - sandwiches, toasted sandwiches, carrots, hummos, tomotoes, olives

dinner - either heinz tomato soup and toast, boiled eggs or baked beans on toast, pizza, chicken nuggets or sausages.

He eats some fruit and brocoli, sweetcorn on the cob, brie and yogurt and crisps, sweets etc but nothing else.

There are no other meals he will eat without retching. I have tried almost everything...

Susia - I would be THRILLED if mine ate all that!!!!

My DD was fantastic eater untill about 18 months..then went all weird and decided she didnt like stuff that she had eaten previously.
I then started being really strict with her meals, and snacks.
Breakfast, snack (fruit or crisps), lunch, then if asked for a snack as long as it was before 3.30pm then she could have a bread stick or a watery fruit/veg (Water melon/Cucumber)then tea at 5/5.30pm.
Also look at the portion sizes you are giving. Maybe reduce his breakfast so he is hungry at lunch.
It was tough but I think it has worked as she is 2.6 and has become more interested in food again and wants to try more stuff.
Stay positive.

yes sounds ok but but he is at an age where he should be able to eat what other people eat. Its difficult at other peoples houses, restaurants, eating as a familly. If someone invites him over for tea I have to say no or he will only eat whatever.

It's embarrassing and difficult. I know the list sounds ok but most meals are a no no

thing is merlin - your son is two. At that age my son was like yours and it was a nightmare so I do sympathise but 3 years down the line I am still struggling to make him eat normal meals. At 5 it really becomes difficult, school meals etc.

Tonight he had a friend back from school, cooked sausages mash and beans. My son ate about a quarter of it and that was one of his favourite meals. When they invite him back next week he will probably refuse everything.

His school is a school dinners only. Sometimes he comes back ravanous cos he hasn't eaten since breakfast.

Merlin, did his food behaviour start with the potty etc training? - you mentioned in one of your posts that was another thing you had to deal with.....just a thought...maybe not eating so doesn't pooh as much ?? ( ok a bit far fetched I know just thinking out of the box )- please don't shout me down !

Oh ladies,

I too am at my wits end with DD1. She used to eat fab but every meal time is now a battlefield!

Breakfast = DRY cereal and I have now started giving her a Yog

Lunch= Slice of ham or she loves the tinned beans & sausage things, Yog or Nutella sarnie

Dinner= sheperds pie (with tons of veg!)or pizza

I long to give her home made pasta meals, roast dinners even carrot and dip but she just refuses!

I have cried over this(how silly) and now vow to carry on trying but without the drama's

Best of luck to us all !!!!