Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

Original poster

How do you deal with Why? Why? Why?

16 replies

blueskythinker · 31/07/2008 22:07

My 3 yr old DD has started saying why? to everything. Even when you answer her, in simple terms, she keeps asking why? and then invariably ends up getting upset, or I do.

Any strategies for dealing with this?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

wrinklytum · 31/07/2008 22:10

I found that at the start of the day I would patiently and smilingly answer all the Whys but by the evening it became "Because it is"

Keep repeating...."This,too,will pass"

It lasts for quite a while!!!!

blueshoes · 31/07/2008 22:15

Yes, you answer until you come to an impasse, then the answer is 'because' ...

ja9 · 31/07/2008 22:17

"why do you think...?"

PavlovtheCat · 31/07/2008 22:19

I am watching this with interest. DD is just two, and I think she picked it from nursery when she moved into the toddler room, but she says it almost constantly too!!!

wrinklytum · 31/07/2008 22:22

If I was really stuck and we were at home I would often say "I don't know,I'll look on Google".

I'm sure ds thinks there is someone called Google who lives in our computer.

Original poster

blueskythinker · 31/07/2008 22:23

Yes, I think DD has picked it up at nursery. I resort in the end, to trying diversions, and pointing out imaginary dogs, squirrels etc out the window. It is a menagerie around us!

OP posts:

SlowDown · 31/07/2008 22:25

Why oh why. With ds it gets worse when he wants attention too! And now, dd at 20 months has started imitating him with 'why' even though I assume does not know what it means! Distraction works best I think.

Tortington · 31/07/2008 22:26

"cos i said so - shut yer gobbins"

PotPourri · 31/07/2008 22:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

fillybuster · 31/07/2008 22:32

DS is just turning 3. I try to answer the 'whys' properly, but not necessarily in totally simple terms, even when I suspect ds won't actually understand the answer. Frequently at a certain point he simply accepts the explanation (even if I'm pretty certain he didn't understand it), or he'll get distracted by getting me to explain something I've said in terms he can understand (IYSWIM), by the end of which he has usually worn out his 'whys'. I agree that they can be pretty trying, and I definitely resort to 'because I said so' for things like 'why do I have to go to the toilet/bed etc?'! Good luck!!

whatdayisit · 31/07/2008 22:36

I agree with ja9 "why do you think it could be?" worked a treat for me. If it was going to be hard work, they wouldn't ask unless they really wanted to know, but it didn't seem to stop them asking the interesting questions, DS2's 1st school report complimented him on being so inquisitive

meandmyjoe · 02/08/2008 11:20

Why is it a problem that kids ask why???? Or maybe you'll all hate me for asking why?!

Of course they ask why, everything is a complete wonder to them and it's our job to explain the world to them. My ds is only one but is in the 'pointing at everything and asking "wha vat?" stage'. I love it. He asks me at least 200 times a day what the TV is but I just tell him it's the TV!

I've mentioned it before but the more they ask, the more they understand. It's only annoying when you honestly can't answer and then I agree with the 'why do you think it could be?' it helps them develop their own opinions and makes them feel valid and important. If you ignore it or get cross then how will they ever learn?

While ever they're asking questions, they're not crying and after the year I've had with ds, I can't wait for the conversation to take the place of endless whinging and crying!

I know it must be annoying but please be grateful that she is so inquisitive and interested in the world. I only pray that my ds does this soon!!!!!

yawningmonster · 02/08/2008 11:28

ds is a walking why, the only time it really, really gets me is when he asks why he did something..eg
"Here is your apple ds"
"Why are you giving me that"
"Um because you just said you wanted an apple"
"Why did I"
"Um I don't know why did you?"
"I asked you"
"yes but it is something you did so only you know the answer"
"Why do I know the answer"
does my head in one why at a time

Bronze · 02/08/2008 11:35

'I don't know why don't you ask Daddy when he gets home' tends to be my stock response.

Roboshua · 02/08/2008 11:45

YM. My DS2 is exactly the same. Had exact same why conversation about getting him a drink the other day which he'd asked for!!!!!

He has now just turned 4 but and still does it but to a much lesser extent. As he got older and I realsied it was just attention seeking rather than actually wanting an answer (ie he was saying 'why' before I'd even finished the reply to the previous 'why'!!!) I would either say 'Why do you think???' or give a really silly answer to snap him out of it.

Why are you in the bath (for about the 20th time???)

'To protect myself from aliens becuase they don't like water'

Of course he would realise this was really silly and we would end have a more two way discussion about aliens in general rather than the constant 'why'???

gingeme · 02/08/2008 12:14

We don't have 'why' we have 'What you doing?' when you could be doing something like sitting together and eating dinner or if I'm giving them a bath or sitting watching the tele sometimes I try a clever answer like 'painting the ceiling' then he just says 'no your not your.......whatever I'm doing. AAaaagghhhh......

Flip