When do toddlers learn commonsense?

[florenceuk]

Just wondering when you felt your toddler learnt "commonsense"? I was struck on holiday how my sister could just let her toddler roam around - she was just over 2 years old. Yes, she still got into mischief (transferring contents of garden into living room bit by bit) but no worries about eg getting into cupboards and pulling out all the plates, swallowing the shampoo, or ripping up all the books and magazines lying around. My DS is 14mths and I'm wondering how long it will be until he shows similar restraint? Or is it a boy-girl/different temperaments thing?

Florence,

I would say it depends very much on the child. Some are driven crazy by curiosity about certain things. For instance, my DS has no interest in kitchen cupboards (except cutlery drawer, unfortunately) but can't keep his hands off my jewellry box and even puts lipstick on his face if he finds some...

Books and mags get similar treatment and we can't keep him from damaging borrowed library books.

So not sure if it's 'commonsense' as such but what forbidden fruit they are most attracted to.

Just a word of warning, he first threw himself on the floor of centre court mothercare at 14 months so be prepared

Ds is 9 and I am still waiting

I wouldn't say that your niece necessarily has already acquired commonsense, just has a different type of curiosity.

For a child to develop common sense requires the parent to define the boundaries really clearly, and for me this means differentiating between the sort of behaviours which are irritating but in themselves harmless (emptying the video cupboard !!) and the overtly dangerous (pulling up a stool and reaching for the cooker). They also need to be aware of safe and dangerous environments in order to encourage caution where necessary, such as holding hands by the roadside. Remember to praise appropriate behaviour especially when it starts to come voluntarily .

However I suspect that you can never really credit your offspring with total commonsense !!LOL

LizS

The toddler taming book lists ages and amounts of sense and I remember them to be fairly accurate but can't remember the ages...I suppose age 40 means "lots of sense, no memory..."

Oh God! I hope it's soon. DS is 16 months and I don't worry about the cupboard-emptying but he won't leave the electric sockets and wires alone. He's driving me to distraction. I've tried everything! His favourite hidey-hole is between the hifi unit and the speaker practising putting the plugs in and out of the extension block. Aaagh! Have you tried hoovering with 24lbs of baby hanging off the back of it?

Surprised the midwive didn't scream in horror - "its an engineer!!!!" ;-)

Oh forgot to mention - turning on any nob/pressing any button he can find. Takes me half an hour to figure out how to get the sound back on the tv. Fortunately DH didn't notice his fave shirt being wahed on 90degrees!!!

BUT there is hope - he knows hot and cold and gives anything deemed hot a very wide berth. Pity it didn't work for the sockets though. Think he's seen through that one! Ho Hum!

My eldest is 4 and is still very very curious, or maybe it's nosy like her Nana, probably the latter, i have to keep ALL makeup and nail polishes locked away and she seems to find the bathroom cabinet very interesting, she also has a fascination with any kind of book or magazine but when she gets bored they look like they've been through a shredder. My youngest who is 10months looks as though she is going to be worse. Aaaaaaaagh, it's a good job i dye my hair otherwise it would be white with these two.

I think it's temperament. My ds is pretty relaxed & easy going and I think there's a lot of luck involved. I'll probably regret this when he's the laziest teenager on the block Mind you I really try not giving any attention to things I don't want him to do, so just put plug covers on the sockets and pretended not to see when he was fascinated by plugs. He did lose interest very quickly when I stopped saying 'No!' and looking agitated.

Aloha, do you mean to say your DS doesn't attack books and magazines, flick switches, swing the door back and forth, push the oven knobs, pull out CDs etc etc??? My DS is into everything, and it can be quite tiring. Yes we could do a better job of toddler-proofing but our house is small (limited places to stash books and things) and my DH is very lazy (hence no cupboard locks). Plus I've noticed DS's capacity to get into things is expanding as he gets taller and is learning to climb - he can already open the bathroom door (prufrock's tip on door knobs came too late for us). I just wonder if there will ever be a time when I can turn my back for a minute? Will have to buy toddler taming I suspect.

My DS's who are 4, think it's great fun to keep flicking the switch off when I'm hoovering. I turn and start walking towards the socket, and on it goes again,this is repeated, until I snap and start running after them.
When I hear the sound of running feet and giggleing somewhere in the house, I know somethings up !!!

Well, he does chew his books but doesn't rip them, so I don't mind. He can't reach ours. Ditto magazines. He wants to flick switches so I let him as long as my arms hold out then rush away madly shouting, 'plane' or 'biscuit' or whatever I think will distract him. He likes to open and shut doors so I let him (unless it's snowing and it's the front door!) Our oven is wall mounted and he doesn't know where we keep the CDs apart from the ones on the high shelf where we've always kept the CD player. He's only interested in his Teletubbies video and ignores the others, fortunately. He does like to play with the switches on the video recorder quite a bit, but I let him. We have a big fireguard and one cupboard lock on the under the sink cupboard with the dishwasher tablets in because he thinks those are sweets or something. It's a sliding lock you just put through the handles, no fitting required. He's obsessed with my makeup bag so I let him play with it, ditto jewellery box emptied of anything swallowable. He's more interested in closing drawers than emptying them, thank God. He likes to dabble his hands in the loo if I forget to put the seat down but so far hasn't worked out how to lift it/can't be bothered to lift it! He likes to climb the stairs so I do spend quite a lot of time following him so he doesn't plummet to his doom. He's not broken anything yet! Oh and I never hoover so that's not a problem

Mine seem to love opening and shutting doors !!!
However,when they were 18 months, old they managed to pull, the door off the front of the washing mashine!!!And last year they pushed our bedroom door, so far back on it's hinges, that it came crashing down, narrowly missing them. There could have been a nasty accident as we have huge, old, wooden doors.

I think it is very much what takes their interest. My ds1 could not resist knobs and buttons and just had to pick everything. He's now 27yo and when we've been shopping I've noticed he still does these things, handling things on display etc, albeit in a gentler manner! He was definitely my worst in that aspect but was fair;y predicatble in what he would go for. Dd1 was a horror for the video machine while dd2 couldn't be left alone because she would play with anything so long as it wasn't a toy.

Well, DS has managed to break quite a few plates already, shut his fingers in drawers, run the door over his toes, destroy and consume quite a lot of various mags and catalogues, rip the flaps off his flap books, lift the loo seat, used his Lego box to try to climb up to reach the next bookshelf (I thought that was quite clever if somewhat unstable), almost dialed my mum in NZ (!), disconnected the speakers, etc etc. Climbing is a particular passion at the moment, and he has eyed the CD player longingly (up on a shelf out of reach at the moment). Not sure what the next development will be - fingers crossed he doesn't learn to climb the stairgate. I'd like to put a long stairgate across the opening to the kitchen (open plan with the living room) but don't know if you can buy ones that long (about 2m) and we are crap at DIY. Looking forward to a restful life in his teenage years maybe?

....around the same time that you become a grandparent....

My DS1 is nearly 4 and is starting to show signs of commonsense, however my DH is 29 and hasn't a single grain of commonsense in his entire body.
So I assume it depends on the person.

Ours dialed 999 when looked after by my mum, the police called them back and gave her a good telling off. He was 9 months old at the time.