Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Does anyone else have child who has an imaginary friend...who is a grown up????

26 replies

Miggsie · 13/07/2008 17:55

DD (aged 4) has an imaginary friend whom she talks about a lot, but I have now discovered this friend is a grown up, with a house and dogs and chickens and who drives around having fun...
I thought imaginary friends were generally children?

DD seems to use her friend to make sense of life events, like when our pet died she says "my friend's pet also died and she buried him as he was dead".

Anyone else's child have a grown up imaginary friend?

Oh, and of course, this friend "lets me stay up till whenever I want". well, they would, wouldn't they?!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
NotQuiteCockney · 13/07/2008 17:57

Oh, DS2's friend is Roman, and sometimes a cat. Sometimes he's dead.

But he isn't a grownup, I don't think - he's DS2's little brother. Only he's older than him.

Miggsie · 13/07/2008 17:59

My mum had an imaginary friend, but I never did, and I find it all a bit baffling...
DD's friend has not died yet but she certainly has good toys and a big garden, that is nicer than ours apparently...I feel so inadequate

OP posts:
RBH · 13/07/2008 18:07

DD1 (3.5) has a set of imaginary friends. Auntie is definitely a grown up who has babies, a car (an Audi apparently!) and a dishwasher. There are also 2 Billys. Big Billy has a beard and is a grown up who is the grand old age of 6!

MindingMum · 13/07/2008 18:33

Oh this has brought back happy memories of my childhood with my 'friend' called John .

He used to let me dress up and make heaps of mess with toys and in return I used to cook his meals. Ho too was an adult.

expatinscotland · 13/07/2008 18:36

My great uncle did.

And he was the man who had been shot out in the garden in a duel before they owned the house.

And who died in the parlour.

Of course, my great uncle had no way of knowing this had happened on the property or that hte man had expired in the house.

But his mother certainly did.

He spoke to and played with this man until he was about 12, then he stopped seeing him.

Travellerintime · 13/07/2008 22:11

DD (3.5) has a whole gang of imaginary friends. The main one in the gang is a naughty little boy called Gob (!), but we do hear about Gob's mother Summer as well.

Like your dd, my dd also seems to use her friends to make sense of life events, as things that happen to her are often mirrored by what she tells us her imaginary friends are doing. Plus, she seems to express her naughty side with her pal Gob (typical Gob statement 'Gob says you're wearing yucky clothes' . I used to have an imaginary friend too, so I'm not worried; I'm reasonably sane .

isheisnthe · 13/07/2008 22:20

anyone remember drop dead fred - that was a fun film about an imaginary friend who re-apeared in a grown ps life when they were having a tough time - was very funny

rowe · 14/07/2008 19:02

my son had one called Emma that played ball with him all the time

BrownSuga · 14/07/2008 19:14

Dh had a grownup one, he worked at the steel mill across the bay (the imag friend did, that is)

HumphreyCushioni · 14/07/2008 19:15

DS1 had two grown up imaginary friends.

thequietone · 14/07/2008 19:15

My DS1 has a imaginary robot friend. He is referred to quite a lot when discussing breakfast options!!

uptomyeyes · 14/07/2008 19:21

DS2 (now 6) had an imaginary friend called "my grandfather". "My grandfather lived in Penge and had a house in Africa made from straw. He wore glasses and had a walking stick but also used a bicycle. He didn't work. "My grandfather" was very wise and DS2 regularly shared his insights with us- especially if it got DS1 into trouble. "My grandfather" disappeared around about the time DS3 was born.

maretta · 14/07/2008 19:23

My son has two imaginary grown up friends. They're like a alternative set of parents.

We can never compete, the imaginary parents have a flying car and live at the south pole.

TheSmallClanger · 14/07/2008 21:39

DD had an imaginary elder sister who could vary in age between 14 and 26 - or that's the oldest I remember her being. Most of the time, I think she was over 18 because she had a job in a pub. Long after Piggy (yes, that's her name) stopped being mentioned, DD and her friend would play that they worked in the imaginary pub that Piggy once worked in. It was called The Bell, it was at the bottom of our garden and it had a "mixer" for making beer in its cellar apparently.

frasersmummy · 14/07/2008 21:58

my ds has an imaginary monster called Michael.

Michael goes most places with us but does have a monster family that he goes home to when he is not sleeping over

all my friends and family thing its funny that its a monster rather than a child

Eddas · 14/07/2008 22:03

my dd has 3 children and a husband she's 4. Her husband is called John. her children are Chelsea, yester and the third varies from Peter to Jamie/Luke and various others

mum2ds1 · 15/07/2008 11:04

yes my ds had a grown up imaginary friend last summer when he was 4 his name was phil and he drove a jcb and other building site stuff oh and big lorries and my ds used to go to work with his phil and would have long conversations with him regarding various jcb etc......everything was my phil this my phil that phil even came to tea one nightphil was his world
havent heard about phil for a few months now so maybe phil has moved on
we werent concerned or worried i think its just their imagination and ds heard us talking about different people and wanted his own(even though he had and still has good friends his own age) it was quite fun listening to him tell us about all the fab things they did together

toobusymum · 15/07/2008 15:56

Ds has several friends, a lion called Rory who is very well behaved (just as well), a dog called Barker and a snake, among others. BTW, they are not imaginary they are invisible...

cocolepew · 15/07/2008 16:04

My friends son used to have an imaginary friend, he used to go into very detailed stories about him. One day he said his friend (can't remember the name), was crying because his house had fell down. He had mentioned the address of his IF before, and we then went about looking it up, just because it really was so detailed. Turns out the house had been firebombed, during The Troubles, and some members of the family were killed. He never spoke about his IF again. He said he had to go and live in America, with his Aunty and Uncle, and was inconsolable for weeks. We, naturally, were completely freaked

cocolepew · 15/07/2008 16:04

My friends son used to have an imaginary friend, he used to go into very detailed stories about him. One day he said his friend (can't remember the name), was crying because his house had fell down. He had mentioned the address of his IF before, and we then went about looking it up, just because it really was so detailed. Turns out the house had been firebombed, during The Troubles, and some members of the family were killed. He never spoke about his IF again. He said he had to go and live in America, with his Aunty and Uncle, and was inconsolable for weeks. We, naturally, were completely freaked

Miggsie · 15/07/2008 16:10

DD keeps saying I should meet her imaginary friend, although DD says she will have to drive the car there as obviously I don't know where the friend lives.
Then there is a pause while DD realises she is only 4, so she says "I will turn into a grown up, drive the car to her house, then I will become 4 again so I can play with all the toys"..

Coclepew..that is freaky, although not uncommon in some Asian cultures where children talking to the departed is not seen as freaky...my friend's dad did it. My dad often does that kind of thing too, and it is somewhat off putting!

OP posts:
SuperSillyus · 15/07/2008 16:10

My dd and ds2 have imaginary friends Emma and Kinky. Dd was only 3 when she told me that 'emma was already deaded' which was I even found myself pushing an empty swing for Emma once

They have talked about them so much that I do feel as if they are part of the family!

Now a few years on the children sometimes incorporate Emma and Kinky into the imaginary game they are playing together, it's sweet.

SummatAnNowt · 15/07/2008 16:11

No, ds's imaginary friend is a monster from another world whose parents were killed!

But he does have an imaginary other mummy and daddy who are strangely much more permissive than we are

branflake81 · 15/07/2008 16:11

When I was a child I had 12 imaginary friends , two parents and their kids ranging in age from 18 to 2.

FossilSister · 15/07/2008 16:31

DD's imaginary friend was called Perfume, but sometimes she didnt even like her...and Perfume scratched and bit her. Now that is worrying!!