help me to see that ds having a behaviour sticker chart at nursery is a positive thing please

[deaconblue]

Have posted before about him going through a smacking/pushing stage (has been a couple of months now, more or less since dd was born) and he's greatly improved when he's with me. He hasn't smacked for 10 days.
At nursery he's jsut as bad and now they want to try a sticker chart where he gets happy and sad faces for good and bad behaviour.
I know I should feel pleased that they are tackling it but it makes me feel really that he is clearly seen as a problem by the staff.

THey're giving you a possible solution though, I don't see this as a bad tihng. How old is he? Bet he is motivated by it.
And it's normal when a sibling comes along, it's all about attention and they'd rather have negative attention (being told off() than none at all. REally, it's normal (bet he's under 5?) and you shouldn't be worried, it'll pass. Promise.

I think it's a good idea, as long as they go easy on on the sad face sigckers.

he was 2 in April. Am so desperate for it to pass as I hate anyone thinking badly of him. He responded well to stickers when I used them to get him to go to the car sensibly a while ago, so maybe he'll get into it. Wonder if I should start one at home too to support what they are doing?

That's the other thing, what if he gets a zillion sad faces?

is Fabio you, Cod?

I am not cod.

Oh he's only 2! Honestly, he won't get a zillion sad faces, bet they're lovely to him at nursery. Tbh I'd say 2 is quite young for a sticker chart, I'd say at this age you just say "No smacking" very calmly and remove them immediately to the hall. And then forget all about it when they come back (1 min later). They don't get med/long term rewards at this point, they need immediate reaction. And it prob is slightly to do with new sibling but I'd also say normal for 2 even without a new sibling.

And noone will think badly of him, he's a very small boy, only just not a baby, he's not bad, or badly behaved, it's all normal. Really.

shopping
if they are doing it properly it is only good. And it sounds like they are.
This isn't him being seen as a problem. This is him being seen as needing a bit more help in one area.
Do you think that the nursery regard a child with toileting issues as a problem, or a speech delay, or being overly talkative?
We only view behaviour as a big deal because we see it as good or bad but actually behaviour is learnt. This is just something your child is learning.

I don't think you should start one at home - but the nursery might think it'll help, so you could ask them.

I think a chart at home too might confuse the issue.

sorry Fabio it's jsut that's her cat's name
thank you everyone, I am overreacting, I know, I think if I can view it how you explain Pagwitch I'll feel a lot better about it.
www what you suggest is what we do at home and what they have been doing at nursery. It seems to be having an effect at home (with regressions every now and then) but not at nursery.

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