Why is 2yr old ds an angel for everyone apart from me?

[TearingMyHairOut]

My son will be 2 next week and has been fairly difficult since he was born. He has suffered with lots of reflux/ colic etc at an early age, and aside from medical problems is like a whirlwind, great temper, needs/ wants constant attention etc.
However, I have recently started to notice that mostly these behaviours are for my benefit. I work part time as a teacher and the time he spends with my in-laws, he is fine, the time he spends at nursery, no problem and when I take him out and about he is a little angel. But the moment I am alone with him, especially at home and becomes completely objectionable. Everything I say/ do, he wants the opposite. he throws himself on the floor, kicks his legs, cries etc etc. People say to ignore this behaviour so he doesn't think he'll get any reaction but he will continue with a tantrum for up to two hours he is so stubborn.
I am at the stage where, by the end of my days off with him, I am wishing I worked fulltime. It feels like he doesn't enjoy it, I don't enjoy spending the day with him like that. Then I feel guilty for not wanting to be with him.

What's the explanation for him only behaving like this with me and what are the tactics for cajooling him out of it. I want to be with him and I want to be a good mum, but I feel like I'm wasting my time coz he's happier elsewhere.

Help please!

This is what I think can be described as The Joys of Parenting.

My ds is much the same. He is worse with me than anyone, even his dad who is actually his primary carer, it doesn't seem to matter. He wants me, all the time, every day. And how do you explain that I have to go to work or do my email at home, because I am the sole breadwinner? But that's precisely why he does it, because he knows it will upset me the most.

It's part of children learning about relationships. There's nothing to be done except say "goodness, isn't it fascinating how children learn about relationships?". It's no reflection on you as a mum, it's just what He Has To Do. I don't think reducing your time with him will even necessarily help, it's just What He Has To Do.

Godawful, innit? The only thing I can say is, you're not alone.

It seems like it! I speak to other mums at work with children of similar ages and they all can't wait to be at home, some even given up work to do so. Tell me their little girls are angels and helpful and slept through the night. can push them around in pushchairs with no objection. Can take them to the supermarket with no tantrum. Can change their nappy, get them dressed with no tears. And I think, who are these strange creatures...or are they lying?

Mothers of Daughters. They are not like we are, not yet. Their time is coming.

It's just a price to pay - all of my friends with girls are finding life easier. Now.

My DS1 can be like this. He just knows which button to press with me. I think its the emotional attatchment that goes with being a mum that makes you react when others ie DH, grandparents etc can detatch themselves a little bit. I also have DS2 (6 months) so am looking forward to the coming years .

From what i see with boys, what you see is what you get. Girls can be very devious and sneaky at a v young age! Plus all boys loves their Mummy....don't they?

DS does this 2.6 - apparently is an angel...

I think its wuite healthy as others have said. HE doesn;t have to be on best behaviour or impress you (subconsciously) you are his mum.

mine isn't. He's part demon/part angel. Remember that when you see "perfect" kids you are only seeing a tiny snapshot. eg if you were in baby clinic yesterday you would have seen my ds sitting like an angel eating strawberries and chatting while his baby sister was weighed. Literally 2 minutes before I had to drag him kicking from the car and force him to walk to the clinic. Snapshots - that's all 2 year olds can be perfect for.

My ds is now nearly 7 and still behaves differently with me. He behaves perfectly with granny and when he goes to friends houses etc, and is better behaved with his dad - but since the age of about 12months he has known how to rub me up the wrong way! DD nearly 4, certainly gets on much beter with me than her brother - I think sometimes it is a personality thing. I'm sure by the teenage years it will all have changed!!

Because your his mummy ! My ds who is 2 next week is exactly the same - an angel with everyone but me...drives me bonkers.

me too i have a little horror who is an angel for everyone except me, i cant get him in a car seat in a buggy cant go to the shops with him.... everyone else can thou??? boys.... im preg with twins due in 4 weeks and really struggling!! glad im not the only one with a little horror!