ds 2.8 seems to be having a few problems at the moment

[whitebeachesandcoconutoil]

I don't know if this should be here or parenting so apologies in advance.
We are under quite a lot of strain in our house at the moment and trying very hard to carry on as normal around ds 2.8. Now I am sure he is picking up vibes because he keeps coming adn giving and asking for cuddles which is lovely and very de-stressing BUT he has in the past had periods of biting and I have always stopped him doing it again by biting HIS toy cat which seems to stop him. but now whenever he is cross he bites, and he will not let go he is like a dog going round in circles and nothing makes him stop.the past two times i have had to let him bite ifyswim and then when he has 'latched'off tell him then that it is really not nice etcand when he sees the mark he has left he does cry .
Also he point blank ignores us keeps doing whatever it is he should't be, sometimes he screams and screams mummy no mummy no at the top of his lings when you want to get him dressed,bathed anything and it sounds awful ,I actually got upset myselftonight cos it sounde like we were hurting hi and all i wasdoing was putting his jimjams on.
So is this all completely normal for his age or is our stress rubbing off on him .
Please someone help because this is really bothering me now. sorry it's so long!

have i posted in wrong place ?

Sounds very, very normal for a child of this age. Its all about him trying to find what he has control over at this age. If things don't go their way, yes they do go off on one. Mine is the same age, and yes it often sounds like murder if I've done something he wanted to do, etc.

I just try to get him to verbalise what he is trying to say: 'mummy, can I put my shoes on please' and repeat it until he says it himself. Or sometimes I say 'Sorry, mummy can't hear you when you scream. Say it properly so I can hear.' If he says it properly, I make sure that I respond otherwise, where is the motivation?

Kids of this age really do have a problem verbalising (even my 5 year-old does sometimes), especially when its something emotional (and what isn't when you are 2?). I have found that repeating how you would like it said really does work after a while. It kind of gives them soemthing to work with, IYKWIM.

A question for you: why do you bite his toy cat to teach him not to bite?

teebee i bite his cat as a punishment i don't want to bite him or smack him and have tried time out etc but none of it worked and then one day he was trying to bite me and i wa stelling him no and he carried on so i said f you bite mama i will bite billy he still bit me so i bit his toy cat but i then sat down with him and his cat and said sorry billycat for biting you i know it was not nice and said to my son who was crying that billy was sad like mama and from that day he didn't bite me until now .extreme maybe but did'nt know whet else to do

you poor thing. Its not a nice time for you both. It is that horrible age. I have one just going into it (22mths) and life is getting stressful. Its probably a bit of both with him picking up on the stress ( I don't know anyone who doesn't have a stress less household at the mo!) but its mostly his age. I have two girls aged 4 and 5 who have both been through it so I know there is light at the end of the tunnel.
My middle one was the biter. she used to draw blood. Grandparents, her sister, me she wasn't selective! We worked on emphasising what hurt is. We didn't shout at her just tried to make her feel bad and say sorry. When she was in the rage we tried to get her to speak rather than lash out or bite. Its frustration at this age. If she was that bad time-out worked. Put him in a safe place until the rage subsides then cuddle and talk to him about why he is so angry. You have to persistent with them at this age. I spend most of the day saying no to my little boy and he doesn't do anything he is told! Nappy changes are a real battle! They are normal little *** and they do grow out of it. Stay positive and strong. xxxx

Sorry, personally not a fan of time out or punishments myself, certainly not at this age (but each to their own). Can you say 'Oh, you are very very angry I can see that. I asked you to do xyz and you wanted to do abc, so you are very cross'. Ok, but NO BITING'. You tell mummy if you are angry, don't bite'. That way you accept the his feelings, but biting absolutely not allowed'.

Otherwise, do you remember that disgusting stuff they used to put on nail to stop you biting them? Could you put that on his usual targets as a deterent?