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My autistic daughter has violent outbursts

3 replies

Fedup360 · 17/05/2026 14:41

My daughter is autistic she’s 6, when she’s overstimulated she head bands and has tantrums and occasionally will hit out at others, but at the the moment it’s all the time, she’s been so calm for the last 6/9 months. So much so that we moved her younger sister 3 into the same bedroom, however in the last week she’s seeking her sister out just to slap her face, or punch her. It’s becoming physically and emotionally draining. My partner is currently crying in the downstairs toilet because it has been relentless this weekend. I’ve just sent my youngest upstairs so we can calm her down.

what do we actually do at this point? What can we try because we’re at a loss. If she’s not hitting, she’s playing in the sink, throwing drinks around, making messes for no reason.

we made her a sensory room under the stairs a couple of years ago and since Christmas it’s been filled with crap that needs sorting through. So today in a desperate bid to give her her safe space back, I emptied it all out and set it up as a sensory room for her again, which has worked slightly but she’s still on one.

OP posts:
Fedup360 · 17/05/2026 14:43

Just to add, since the change is behaviour the youngest has been back in our room, I never would have moved her in if I thought it wasn’t safe

OP posts:
TinyMouseTheatre · 18/05/2026 07:43

it’s really good that you’ve realised that she needs her own space to try and regulate.

Can you try and switch around how you think about her behaviour. So instead of violent outbursts she’s showing you that she’s really not coping?

What does she have in place now to support her? Does she have an ECHP?

How is her communication?

And have you tried any books like 10 days to a less defiant child or tried any strategies for dealing with PDA?

I’d also recommend coming on over to the SN section. Posts in there don’t show up in the live feed so they don’t tend to attract the attention of parents of NT DC who can sometimes give really inappropriate advice for dealing with a ND DC Flowers

10 Days to a Less Defiant Child, second edition

The popular, powerful guide to help parents regain control over a defiant child or teenager Occasional clashes between parents and children are not uncommon, but when defiant behavior-including tantrums, resistance to chores, and negativity-becomes chr...

https://www.worldofbooks.com/en-gb/products/10-days-to-a-less-defiant-child-second-edition-book-jeffrey-bernstein-phd-9780738218236#GOR007477855

TinyMouseTheatre · 18/05/2026 19:14

How is everything tonight @Fedup360?

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