Supporting a very shy child struggling to make friends at new school

[ChirpyMintEagle]

Would love some advice about how you are supporting your kids through friend problems. My DS is currently finding it very hard to make friends - he's new to school, and all the other kids seem to know each other already / have formed really strong connections. Plus he is VERY shy, and needs a lot of encouragement to go up to someone new, let alone ask to play. When I ask him about his friends at school, he doesn't want to talk about it and changes the subject. How can I support him through this, and is there anything I can do to make it easier for him to find a proper friend at school??

I understand what you're going through. I've had a similar issue with my eldest. He's 7 and has been really struggling to fit in - his 'friends' won't let him play with them and constantly put him down and call him weird. I think his confidence is really low and his teacher says he's very quiet now in class, but he always seems happy and confident at home. I found that letting staff know that he's struggling has been really helpful though, I'd really recommend it as they can keep an eye out and help throughout the day. Also, our school have recently sent a flyer round about a new BBC show about helping kids who are struggling to make friends, and I'm thinking of signing up. I'll attach the flyer incase its of interest x

Hiya - thanks for responding. It's good to know others have the same situation, and I'll deffo think about letting staff know. I just don't want to embarrass him, and he always seems so uncomfortable about getting support from teachers - but I suppose it is important for them to know. The Bbc thing looks great - a fab idea. I think he'd find it fun to be involved too! I'll look into applying - thank you for sharing it

no worries at all. it's nice to hear from a fellow mum who's going through the same struggle. our little ones will be ok 🤗

I would definitely speak to the teacher and let them know how hard he's finding it. They can do things like put him with a child he might get on with when the class is working in pairs, or the school might have a group for those struggling a bit with friendships.

Once he has a name or two of children he'd potentially like to know better, I'd try to arrange a park meet up or similar so he has a chance to get to know the other child one on one or in a small group.