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Original poster

Emotional 9 year old

4 replies

Billiejean05 · 21/03/2026 22:19

Hi, anybody going through anything similar at the moment.
My daughter is 9 and recently become very emotional and worried.
We had a good talk and she says she doesn’t know why she feels like this but was wanting reassurance that it is normal.
She has gone through a big change in her friendship group in the last couple of weeks so it could be that.
It is so upsetting to see her like this as she is normally so happy. Could this be hormones playing a part? She has also started developing breast buds recently too?

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TinyMouseTheatre · 22/03/2026 07:41

Yes it very much could. Sounds like you’ve realised though and want to support her which will be good for her and your relationship.

At around this age I found the Preteens Section on MN very useful but this section is good too Smile

I’d recommend the book Untangled by Lisa Damour. It was recommended to me and I think it’s helped me and DD to weather a lot of the puberty and teen dramas. Lisa Damour also does some podcasts.

A Mighty Girl has some great recommendations on books about friendships and you can see which ages they’re suitable for. I got a couple for DD at around that age. Girl’s friendships can be tricky once the hormones start to kick in! I think having activities away from school helps too. It means that all socialisation isn’t occurring with the same small set of friends.

Might be time for the talk about periods too if you haven’t already. I did at 9 as a girl at Guide Camp when I was that age started her periods and didn’t know what was going on.

Untangled - Lisa Damour, PhD

In her New York Times best seller, Dr. Damour draws on decades of experience and the latest research to reveal the seven distinct—and absolutely normal—developmental transitions that turn girls into grown-ups, including Parting with Childhood, Contendi...

https://drlisadamour.com/books/untangled/

TeaIsLovely · 22/03/2026 16:37

Billiejean05 · 21/03/2026 22:19

Hi, anybody going through anything similar at the moment.
My daughter is 9 and recently become very emotional and worried.
We had a good talk and she says she doesn’t know why she feels like this but was wanting reassurance that it is normal.
She has gone through a big change in her friendship group in the last couple of weeks so it could be that.
It is so upsetting to see her like this as she is normally so happy. Could this be hormones playing a part? She has also started developing breast buds recently too?

Hormones can cause havoc - my DD started her periods at age 10.I’d say probably normal - from experience saying “you have nothing to worry about” is probably not going to help.

Juliajojo · 22/03/2026 22:16

Puberty and hormones play havoc.
I was that age when I started to notice my body changes.
I calmed down more once my periods started, The next few years may be rough, hopefully once she starts her periods she will calm down. At the moment lots of hugs and space needed. Also better get her stocked up on pads and tampons ready just in case.

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