Very clever 15 month old - what next???

[GiraffeHarmonica]

Hi. I’d like some advice on what I do to encourage / help / sustain / guide a kid who really seems to be ahead of the curve intelligence wise. This isn’t a boast post, I would really like some support because I am totally out of my depth.
My daughter is 15 months old, and something has happened today to make me think that she might be a whole other level beyond just being “quick on the uptake”.

She’d just picked up one of her Yoto audiobook cards from the coffee table and was looking around for the Yoto machine to play it on (the room by this point was fairly chaotic with a few toys around, and she carries it around often so it’s not always in the same place or even necessarily in the same room). I watched her cross the room and pause where it often is, then looked around a bit clearly trying to look for it. I said, “it’s on your left” and she quickly did a full body turn to the left, paused for a bit before shouting when she spotted the Yoto and putting the card in.

I thought she’d stand there and ask for help then I’d come over and show her, I wasn’t really expecting her to follow the direction! I was completely behind her field of vision at that point, about 4 meters away, so she couldn’t see any gestures or anything helpful contextually for this at all.

We do always say “left foot” or “right arm” or whatever when getting dressed (and mix it up a bit sometimes) so logically I suppose she must have figured out what left and right mean on her body, but this seems a bit... wild? At this age?

There’s been a few other moments I’ve thought “oh okay that’s earlier than I thought it would be” but this really takes the proverbial.

She’s not at nursery so can’t ask them.

I am formally diagnosed with both autism and ADHD, so this isn’t a question of whether she’s neurodivergent – I strongly suspect that genetics don’t really give her much of another option.

My question is really what do I do now, how do I support or guide her in a way that avoids her being the know-it-all asshole when she starts nursery / preschool / school?

To be honest, I think this is quite normal for this age? My DD is 14m and responds to instruction in this kind of way!

Turning a specific way based on verbal info alone isn't just following instructions though is it? Genuine question.

I mentioned this to some friends with similar aged babies and they definitely don't know left/right or could follow a similar direction without pointing or additional guidance.

She probably is a bit ahead. My first was the same. If you want to avoid her being big headed then praise the effort, not what she achieves. Read to her a lot but do other things with her so that she is exposed to a wide variety of activities and can choose which ones she prefers when she’s older.

Thanks. Focusing on the effort is a great idea I'll check how I phrase things. She seems to love most things so far! So in many ways that's a good head start I guess

It’s such a wow moment when they suddenly catch on to something you’ve been teaching isn't it? Honestly, try not to overthink the "genius" angle just yet!
With a first child, it’s so easy to get swept up in it all, and feel like they’re hitting a whole other level, but 15-month-olds are absolute sponges. If you’ve been saying "left foot" every morning since she was born, she hasn’t necessarily mastered abstract navigation,she’s just learned a very impressive party trick through repetition. It’s a sign of great parenting and a consistent routine more than a sky-high IQ, but impressive definately for hwr age!
The thing with toddlers is that development is rarely linear. They often have these massive leaps in one area (like language or following directions) and then completely stall for six months while they work on something else, like walking or social skills. By the time they hit school at 4 or 5, the kids who knew their lefts and rights at 15 months and the kids who didn't usually end up on a totally level playing field, excelling I'm different areas.
Instead of worrying about her being a "know-it-all" later, I’d just enjoy the fact that she’s a quick learner for now. The best support at this age is just letting her play. If she is neurodivergent, the real challenge in school usually isn't being too smart for the work, it’s the sensory and social side of things. Focusing on those softer skills now will do her way more favours than worrying about her being ahead of the curve academically!

I say the latter as a mother of two children, one high functioning AuADHD who is too smart for own good.

Being able to follow some simple instructions without gestures at that age is fairly typical (for example, following instructions to go get a familiar object from another room appears on the 14 and 16 month developmental questionnaires). Knowing left from right at 15 months is much more unusual, but if you habitually say it, they will pick it up. (I habitually counted things with mine from newborn and ended up with tiny tots going one, two, three, etc. as they stacked blocks or whatever.)

None of which is to say she isn't exceptionally bright – she very well could be! My approach has been to try to balance following their interests with exposure to a broad range of things. I also try to praise a wide range of things, including a fair bit on effort, being kind, good listening, etc. and to keep an eye on their overall development. Mine have actually kept themselves relatively well balanced so far, but I want to know if gross motor or social development started to lag so we can spend more time at the play park or whatever to encourage those skills.

I also try to treat all interests and activities equally. If they want to play with their magnetic letters, great, that's a lovely activity. If they want to put on wellies and go jump in puddles, that's equally great. A small child often gets a lot of praise (including from family friends, relatives, and complete strangers) for academically clever things, but actually, jumping in puddles is just as important developmentally (and it's fun!). You don't want them to get a sense that the academic is preferred or how they get praise and attention.

Thank you @skkyelark and @ShowmetheMapletree lots to think about