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4 month old wont be put down

2 replies

B9r0kre · 03/01/2026 18:36

I'm exhausted. I'm surviving off little to 0 sleep, to the point where I feel delusional and almost like I'm floating.

My 4 month old is a high need baby, and its almost like i have him superglued onto me. He won't be put down for more than a few seconds to a minute or 2 without crying. I don't mind during the day, because it is what it is. However, at night is a different story. He wakes up every 20-45 minutes all night, and screams until I pick him up and latch him. I've always hated cosleeping and never did it with my first, but he won't sleep anywhere other than physically in my arms. Its not good for his posture, and not good for me because I don't actually sleep... Hes in my arms, and still wakes up every 20-45 minutes anyhow.
I tried letting him whine/cry for a minute or two last night, and he went sick all over himself and the bed... I don't know what to do. I can't function, I'm having migraines daily, and Im slowly losing myself😭 I dread going to bed, because when hes sleeping... my body isn't allowing me to shut off, and is almost waiting for him to wake up. I have a 4 yead old, and I just feel awful that im sooo exhausted.
I've always baked cakes/savoury bits when my mental health is bad, and it always gets me through. But, i can't even get through baking a cake without him screaming to pick him up... ive tried using a baby carrier, still fusses.

I just feel so lost and dont know what to do! Any advice or help appreciated 💕

OP posts:
Sassylovesbooks · 03/01/2026 18:51

Oh my lovely I do feel for you, my son was exactly the same, and it's bloody hard. My son barely napped in the day and he would only sleep on me. I breastfed, and he wouldn't take a bottle (believe me I tried every bottle available and it made no difference if it was expressed milk or formula). I spent the first 6 months like a zombie, barely knowing what day it was. I didn't have any other children, so for you it's even harder. Will your son sleep on your husband/partner? Could he take the early shift, so from may be 7 pm to midnight and you take over at midnight? You need some help, because you can't carry on as you are, sleep deprivation will make you unwell. I discovered my son liked the feel of my dressing gown, I would wear it at night. As it happened, I had a small blanket made of the similar material - put it into his cot, he grabbed and snuggled it, and went straight to sleep!!! I honestly couldn't believe it. I tried a dummy, he spat it out, he'd never sucked a thumb or anything. It also helped once he started to crawl, he burned off more energy.

SleafordSods · 04/01/2026 10:17

I feel for you too, my first was like this and there is a reason sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture.

With my DC1 it turned out to be Tongue Tie. Does your LO have any of these symptoms?

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