I'm really just looking for someone else who may be going through the same thing and could offer any advice or just reassurance, I hope.
My son is 5 and started his reception class in September. Since then he has had more bad than good days, behaviour wise. I now dread the school pick up as I expect to be called by his teacher to discuss his behaviour or whatever he has done that day in class. First of all it was him simply not listening and doing his own thing, which I disciplined him for but also didn't worry too much about as moving from nursery to reception has been a big adjustment, they have lots of homework now, more academic work during school hours, his teacher is stricter which honestly I believe he needed. Always been a boisterous, strong willed child but this is becoming an issue now. At home, he listens well to me and only has the occasional day where he is naughty and gets told off. But school seems to be really bothering him at the moment. He has started saying he doesn't want to go as he misses me, but I think it's because he's fed up of being told off. However, I have told him he won't be told off if he behaves as best as he can and listens to the teacher. Recently and today, it's been that he's been running around wildly when they should be sitting and listening, not relinquishing the iPad when he's asked to (this has never been an issue before, only past few days) ignoring his teacher when he's asked not to do something, and apparently today he was trying to leave the classroom which is worrying me as it is out of character. Just generally being disruptive and silly. I'm really torn here. I know I must discipline him for his bad behaviour, and I do every time, such as taking toys away, play time, screen time, no sweets/treats etc, early bed time, today I reached the end of my tether and started putting toys into a bin bag which really upset him but I told him he would not be getting them back until he could behave better at school. I'm also worried that he is rebelling against authority (stricter teacher than at nursery) struggling to concentrate with the work load etc.
For some context, his dad (my ex) hasn't been in touch or had contact since September. It was a messy break up some years ago but we co parented well up until he announced he had a new gf and became hostile, ceased paying child support and let contact with my son fizzle out. My son hasn't expressed upset at this, he hasn't really noticed which is sad (ex wasn't a great dad to begin with) and I think I should stress this to his teacher tomorrow when I go for the parent consultation. Just in case this is something that is causing him to act out in school. It doesn't escape me how much of a coincidence it is that the behaviour issues have begun at the same time his dad checked out.
Past few months I have also noticed my son gets irritated or angry with loud noises and becomes overstimulated. They were practicing for his Christmas play today at school and he told me he wasn't behaving because the hall was too loud.
When the teacher booked the consultation with me last week, she said she would like the ALN coordinator to sit in on the meeting and discuss a few things due to my son's behaviour.
I'm really worried and upset, stressed about it as at first I was defensive but now I'm beginning to think maybe there could be an underlying issue. My son is a good boy, very loving, very polite and caring. He is also excelling in his school work, reading and writing, so it's a shame that his behaviour is overshadowing his potential.
Again, sorry for the lengthy post, just needed to vent a bit, seek some advice or similar situations, as I want to do right by my son and defend and support him as much as I can but also work with the teachers to support him at school.
Thank you.