How do i get dd2 (4months) to sleep in the evening?

[littlemonstersmum]

really struggling with dd2 in the evening- she has a bath at 5.30ish then i feed her and put her to bed at 6ish. she then sleeps for approx 30mins and is then awake again until about 9.30-10pm. have a demabding 3yr old too so really need an hour or so to myself in the evening or i think i'll go mad! anyone got any ideas?

i have been wondering whether she gets enough milk at that last feed- i'm debating giving her some formula tmw night and seeing if it helps now she's a bit older. thanks for all the moral support!! dh doesn't seem to get as anxious as i do!

This sounds like Baby Whisperer stuff to me.

A baby sleep cucle is about 40 mins.

I had a dd like this, did all the Baby Whisperer shush/pat stuff, and it was fantastic

Cc is too hard and upsetting, BW is much gentler and soothing.

Dh's never get as anxious as mums

oh, i read that book when dd1 was born but lent it out after and can't remember what she said to do- can you remind me of the technique?!

isn't it
swaddle
place sideways
jiggle
give something to suck (?)
shush in ear?

but thought it was most effective with younger ones-wait..think I've got the wrong baby whisperer-the one I saw was one Richard & Judy some years back

Is it the 4 s's?

Soothe, swaddle, shush sleep?

1), have wind down time ( i hated that bit)
2) Swaddle
3) Pat gently at hearbeat rhythm, saying shush shush
Lo should fall asleep.

If she always wakes up after about 30 mins, be ready straight away to do shushing stuff again, and repeat until they fall asleep. I used to find that if I didn;t get to dd within about 3 seconds of her waking up, that was it. She would be wide awake, so move fast at first whimper.

BW reckons tey have to be taught to sleep, that 30-40 mins is her sleep cycle stuff, that's why you have to be fast.

dd was a nightmare, as my many desperate past thrads on here will prove. She's a great sleeper now. It will come Still think BW is God

sounds complicated!! lol

do you pat them while they're in their cot?

Oh, and as lo starts to fall asleep slow down patting until stopped. Don't stop patting until they fall asleep, even if it takes an hour (of course I'm sure you have nothing better to do....!)

Forgot the last "s", which is "Stay" so you can resettle if they wake again. Stay for at least 20 mins (I loatehd that bit), but leaving too soon always caused problems

Oh yes, pat in cot, when swaddled. BW used to say something about propping up with a towel, and patting their back,but I always patted dd's tummy and that was fine.

what if she's crying her little eyes out? i tried stroking her face and rubbing her tummy while she was in her cot this evening and she really wouldn't clam down- poor little thing!!

I have 4 month old too and similar probs with sleep but only when she is overtired (i.e. evening sleep!)

I leave her to cry if it is a 'tired cry' but pick her up for a cuddle if the cry is really distressed. Then put her back down in the cot when she has calmed down. Sometimes I have to do this a few times but I find that the crying tires her out and eventually she falls asleep.

You are lucky your LO sleeps so long though. Mine wakes twice a night for a feed! In fact I had better go to bed myself now!

sounds like she has a nap at 5.30/6 then goes to bed at 9/10? why not just go along with it for a few more weeks, til she drops the 5.30 nap and can stretch til 6.30 or 7? I know it's knackering and you need some time after putting the older one to bed but it will only be a few weeks more before she can drop that sleep
no need to doubt your milk supply btw and no evidence that formula helps babies sleep any longer at night

I can't remember . I think that's why you have to get there fast before they work themselves up. I would pick her up until she calmed down and then start shush/pat thing again...although I think BW was very keen on consoling in the cot....

However have just read some of your earlier posts about daytime naps, and I think she sounds as if she is not gtting enough daytime kip, and poss getting overtired.

I,m sure the guidline at this age is 2 hours am, 3 hours pm, and possible catnap at about 5.30 pm for abouy 40 mins to get through to bed time. It sounds as if your lo is doing the catnap thing, but needs to be helped to go to bed at nighttime sleep.

God, it is so hard isn't it? I remember that despeeration at a none sleeping lo when every one elses would sleep anywhere. My dd slept at night at this age, so hv not helpful at all, despite the fact dd was so tired in day and cried non stop.

ds who is older would sleep anywhere, so nothing prepared me for that . It does get better, dd 23 mo now, and sleeps all night.

HTH

I agree with Morocco. I think she is having a catnap in the evening.

I would try and put her to bed about 8.00pm. I don't think they can go longer than about an hour at this age without a nap.

that sounds quite sensible actually- got a friend staying tonight so can't really let do the crying thing tonight so will try putting her down at up- will keep you posted!!!!

how did it go?

With my 11wk old we do
bath 6pm
feed in bed (bf) both sides (wake up if she falls asleep in the middle)
put down. Usually she wakes again so she gets one last go at bf. If she wakes after this she gets a dummy as she just sucks instead of feeding.
Asleep usually by 745pm until 3-5am depending on daytime feeds.
We had to get tough because she would demand constant cuddling/rocking/sucking to sleep. I leave her awake in the cot if she hasn't fallen asleep after the last time bf.
She now realises that when I say night night it means no more pick ups.

Like OMY said, I leave dd2 to cry if its a tired cry but pick up if its high pitched/windy cry iyswim.

I have a similar problem with my dd1 who goes to bed at 7pm. My DH reads her a story and then I go in and say good night after the second side bf. I then go back into dd2 if she needs a third attempt iyswim.

well, we tried a couple of nights putting her down at 7ish and letting her scream- but i can't tell yet between tired cry and something bad cry! hated it- so had a re-think. decided her little body clock was telling her that bedtime was at 9.30ish, so put her to bed at 9 on sunday night, then 8.30 last night then 8 tonight and (touch wood) it seems to be working! thank god!! hopefully tomorrow it will be 7.30 then 7 the next night which i think is much more acceptable!!

that's great news. Hope it continues to work. wish you well.