HELP! Hysterical 13 month old - seperation anxiety - how to approach?

[gerbo]

Help! My daughter is currently screaming like mad upstairs and I don't know what to do....She is just getting over a tummy bug (bad dioarrhea for 6 days) and is generally a bit grumbly by the end of the day, but OK.

She used to have a really easy, regular routine and go down to sleep like a dream. However over the last couple of days she just stands there at the side of the cot screaming when we leave her having said goodnight, etc. And she doesn't stop!!! It's whiny, screamy crying...
and if I go in and sit next to her cot, she goes quiet and to sleep in a little while.

However I just tried sitting in with her and she messed about, calling 'mama' etc. for ages so I left again as I don't want her to think I'm there for fun.

What should I do? React to the crying? Sit in there till she sleeps (even if she's happily messing around, standing up in the cot), leave her to cry it out???? Help! It's so out of character...........

Would appreciate any advice? Maybe I should dig out my copy of the baby whisperer again! That seemed to help when she was little. We've just had a smooth ride so far and now I'm a bit at sea....
Oh - she's also really clingy with me at the mo, and won't even be held etc. by her dad, when she was fine until about 4/5 days ago - weird - seperation anxiety brought on by being ill????

Bump - anyone!? (she's still going although it's going quiet up there - feel like a real meanie)

My DD is 14months and we went through a similar stage a short while ago. I did the sitting in the room by the door with my back to her so she knew I was there, but didn't interact with her. She would usually play/cry/whatever for a maximum of 10 mins before she fell asleep and I took the opportunity to read (a bit of a luxury these days!). Hard though if she's not been well. She's proabably clingy because she's not been well.
I can now put her down and leave the room and she pute herself to sleep, so it did get better! Hope it sorts itself out for you soon!

I would go up and give her a cuddle. If she didn't look sleepy I would just bring her down stairs and carry on as usual. Illness often buggers up their routines.It will sort itself out. No point leaving her screaming - makes it worse IMO and does nothing to help if she's feeling a bit insecure

Thanks mums - I will try the reading by the door thing for a while then and I guess if she's messign about get her up for a wihle. I'm obviously a bit impatient.........it's just a bit annoying when you've had such an easy routine for so long.

Is the rejection of dad normal though? Poor thing's a little demoralised as they used to have a great time in the bath every night but now she goes bananas if I'm not right there at the bath side - it's crazy - and will only be held by me - does this pass too?

Yup! They go through so many phases... Unfortunately some of the good routines sometimes go too. (My DD has just started waking up before 6 again - aaargh!). Am sure your DD is just settling again after being ill.