weaning - what are your views????

[mummy2t]

Hi all, my little one is 15 weeks and i am not going to start weaning until 6 months. after talking to alot of different mums i have have found not many of them share my view! some are definately going to wean at 4 months, some i have met have considered weaning BEFORE 4 months and i was told on one woman who has been giving baby rice at bed times to try and get baby to sleep through!!!????!!!! bubba is only 3 months old!!!! i am quite shocked that there are so many people that just ignore advice thats out there, thinking they know better. What does everyone think about this??

If it worked for you its great. It just had such a crap effect on my first son that I always like to tell people who think its the answer to an unsettled/no sleeping/no weight gain baby. Also he developed excema.

I can see the logic behind your weaning MM, but I think, personally, the risk of gut related problems later on in life (the whole 'my baby is fine' line doesn't work as it is related to conditions in adulthood, not just babies)outweighs any ideas I may have about baby having 'too much' milk (what is too much? surely what is the right amount is what is needed to satisfy them?) but isn't worth the risk of feeding an immature gut.

How can a baby have too much milk? Milk is what babies eat!

msappropriate, I'm sorry your ds developed excema - you think that it was because of early weaning?
My niece and nephew both have excema and were bf exclusively for 6 months, if that's any consolation. Think it's hereditary more than anything isn't it? But I'm no expert.

Anyway, to the OP, as you can see, most MNetters would agree with you that waiting 6 months is the 'right' thing to do.

There aren't "views" on weaning - there are facts. And the facts say that, although weaning early is not going to hurt most babies, it will hurt some, and there is no way of knowing which category any one baby fits into. A mother's instinct cannot see whether the gut is mature enough for solid food, and the baby being interested in food is not a reliable indicator - my ds was fascinated by the steering wheel at 5 months - that didn't mean he was ready to learn to drive! So, as early weaning has no benefit, it shouldn't be done, just in case your baby is one of the minority who will suffer gut problems or allergies because of it.
It's a no brainer, frankly!

I know the too much milk thing sounds weird and nonsensical but it made sense to me at the time! Have you seen how much 10oz of milk is? In one sitting? Every three hours?
MM.

thank you everyone, i didnt realise i was opening such a big can of worms, it's nice a healthy to air our opnions like this!!

Time for me to leave now I think. I've given more than my penny's worth.

Well it developed a week after I started. No one in our familes has it and his younger brother who was bf till 6 months didn't get it. Also my niece was early weaned and is allegic to tons of stuff. I think most of the ingredients in the 4-6 months section of a famous puree-ing gurus cookbook I think!

Who knows where it was it was safer (and less work) for me to wean later with my second. Both of them are fussy little buggers now so am not advocating gone way or another because of that.

My friends dh had digestives in his bottle from a scarily early age and has the worst ibs I have ever heard of. Similarly another friend was one of those kifd in the late 60s who had carnation milk. He has loads of stomach problems. But those are extreme examples not just a bit of rice and fruit and veg. God I wish they did satisy and fill you up I would do much better on diets then.

I menat Who know why it was (the excema)

I've done my reading and made my decision - as per guidelines - to wait till 6 months (although we might make food available a little before then so DS can decide when he's ready)

I've been complaining today that because of this I feel like a real outcast in my baby groups. (see thread)

I think that mums get together and convince themselves that weaning their babies will bring about world peace, and that it'll be fine for their baby cos it was fine for them/their friend/the milkman. I guess it is because looking after a 4/5 month old can be hard, and very tiring, and they'll take whatever is offered as a solution.

I tell myself that this will pass, and if I need to spend several hours a day feeding while typing one handed or soothing a teething baby, that's what I'll do. (heh, I need the rest too) I hope it doesn't sound smug but really this is what I signed up for. It will pass - and then we'll have something else to worry about

i think it is always going to come down to the mother or fathers choice as to wean their children, they know them best and every child is different in terms of weight / age/ hungrier etc etc. i think i will still hold of as long a possible, ds2 is 16 weeks on sunday and gaining weigh steadily on 5 6oz feeds a day. Sometimes he drains the bottle, sometimes he leaves 2 oz, sometimes he goes every 4 hours sometimes its 3. i do know he has his last feed at 10 ish and goes through until 6/7am so he definately isnt going hungry.
i think every bubba is different!

Everybaby is different, I agree - but their guts are different too, and there is ABSOLUTELY NO WAY of knowing how mature a gut is. Hunger, size, weight, development, none of these have any bearing at all on gut maturity. Why run the risk? Even if it's a small risk, it's still a risk. Why?

Bigger babies can go longer than six months, it's a cop out. All babies are designed to go to a least six months (actually a very early age if you look around the world and history) whatever size they are. They all develop at similar rates, there is some variation but size isn't a factor in it, no more than it is safe for a 12 year old to be drinking loads just because he is 6'.

mummy2t my daughter was a 31 weeker, I weaned her at 6 months because she was showing the signs of readiness and as a BLW baby she was never going to be pushed beyond her capabilities.

"He stared at me and DP eating"

Tink loves to watch me cooking, she gets so excited when I do. I'm thinking of starting to teach her to cook next week.

"I was just offering my opinion and own personal experience"

Yes, but if the counter (scientific) argument isn't put across then readers who don't know why there is more than just "personal experience" to weaning aren't going to know.

"I am still happy with my decision and my ds1 is just dandy."

Come back and tell us that when he's lived his life and is dead. Tell us then that his life and health has been "just dandy". He is far too young to judge now whether he has been effected by early weaning.

"on top of huge helpings of puree"

Well yes, he would need more milk if you were giving him purees when he could only digest milk as it was taking up space in his stomach that milk couldn't and he needed the extra calories to work through the stuff that could have been wallpaper paste for as much use as it was to him!

"it wasn't a growth spurt I'm sure as I gave it a good three weeks"

Who said growth spurts have to last less than three weeks?

sorry, i had to come back.

easy, tinkerbellesmum. I'm hoping that by the time my ds1 is dead (what a delightful way of putting it, thank you so much) that I won't be around to come back and reply to your haughty post.
Fair enough, you disagree with me, but there is a hint of hysteria and aggression in your post.
Also, you misquote me rather unfairly. "on top of HUGE helpings of puree" - that "huge" was your own addition. In an effort to make me look even worse..??

I guess I thought it was weird for growth spurt in 4 month old to go on for 3 weeks because I was told by GP and HV that spurts at that age happen about once a month so surely if they went on for longer than 3 weeks or so they'd be having one continual growth spurt...?

The OP did ask for people's thoughts. I offered mine. So shoot me.

in fact, I wrote "on top of the small helpings of puree I was giving him" ... and "tiny amounts of food".

your (deliberate?) misquote was totally unfair.

Sorry I didn't mean to do that, I C&Ped most of the quotes, I must have typed that and it really wasn't deliberate as it is totally irrelevant to my point. I have a form of dyslexia as I have written about a few times where my brain changes words sometimes for the opposite sometimes totally random words, either what I have read or what I write.

I really am sorry about that

Sorry you don't like me talking about your son dying but it's a fact of life we grow old and die. Before then we can't say how well we did things, whether something had no effect on us because there is still time to tell.

I also hope you never have to bury a child, I would not wish that on anyone. I've stood at a grave and watched my precious first born daughter lowered into it by her father and uncle.

I'm not shooting you, I'm offering an alternative for anyone reading this who wants two sides of things, that's what debate is about.

fair enough, tbsmum, but invoking the image of my own child dying is a bit harsh. I know about death, too. I'm truly sorry for your horrendous, unthinkable loss. Let's hope my son leads a full and healthy life and yes, if he ends up with IBS then we all know who's to blame...
And debate is great but it needn't be aggressive or personal.
I am happy to admit that my opinions on weaning are out of line with most others on this post.

signing out, finally!
MM

I meant at the end of his life as an old man. I truly believe we can't say anything worked or didn't work or look back on our life until the end and that was the only point I was trying to make.

I'm rereading posts three times now, made a few corrections in there. Think my autoimmune disorder is playing up rather than it being my dyslexia cause too much is happening at the moment

I started to wean dd at 6 months (she was fully breastfed until then) She liked playing with food but hardly ate a thing until she was about 14 months, we did BLW so she had total control of what went into her mouth.
Now at 23 months she will eat absolutely anything and always tries new things, she's not fussy in the least. Last week we had clam chowder and she loved opening the clams and getting at the meat. Six months was definitely right for her as a start time. As far as I'm aware there's no set time limit on when they should be eating 3 meals a day either.

I think a lot of people start weaning around 4 months cos babies get a bit boring then and they want to get them to the next stage in development! Also developmentally around 4 months they are able to keep themselves awake better and so they stop being fed to sleep so easily and wake up more through the night. Weaning is often seen as the answer to sleep problems when the reality is very different.

But, MabelMay - you actually can't have an opinion about early weaning - it's not a matter of opinion - it's a matter of fact. I just don't understand why anyone can think it's a decision that parents can make on instinct or personal judgment! Why do people feel they can ignore this particular piece of information when they don't ignore the information about smoking or putting babies on their backs to sleep?

It was a 'fact' that weaning should take place between 4 and 6 months a few years ago. 'Facts' have an habit of changing and can always be countered with contradictory evidence. It's up to us as parents to do our research and make our own decisions.

We were advised to wean our ds at 4 months by our paediatrican (he has severe reflux). We've held on until 22 weeks because I was worried about the possible effects. The health professionals we have dealt don't seem to be gripped by the same horror over early weaning as many of the posters here.

I have to wonder where all this self righteous pronouncing is coming from.

I really don't understand. Things change. Knowledge increases. Not long ago, it was OK not to strap children in cars. We didn't realize that folic acid can help prevent spina bifida and cat poo can carry toxoplasmosis. But nobody says you're self righteous if you suggest that people ought to use car seats or wear rubber gloves to change the cat's litter tray when you're pregnant. So how come it's self righteous to say that people ought to follow the latest research about weaning?

Weaning was never a fact until they discovered things that made it 6 months. They told you what people were doing, they didn't think it was a problem to wean that early because no one had done any research into it.

Do you think someone can post a direct (or near as dammit) link to the weaning research? It is often quoted, but I have been completely unable to find any of it.

(And I mean the actual research, not NHS, WHO or UNICEF guidelines)