Hello, first post on here but looking for abit of advice I suppose, those of you with children with ASD/Adhd, does it sound like my child has additional needs? I know it looks different with every child but for context, my 2.5 year old boy is waiting for a referral with a paediatrician. But sometimes I second guess myself and think is he just a little delayed?
Bit of a back story, I have a 4 year old girl and when she was a baby, I adapted and coped really well. Come round to having my boy and obviously it was always going to be hard having 2 so close together but from the get go, he never slept and I mean he was up every half hour in the night, wouldn’t nap during the day. He didn’t cry, he was just always restless and never settled and that literally went on until he was about 1.5 years old. By that point I was really struggling because of the lack of sleep and did the forber method as last resort (please no judgement, I never left him to cry out) after 3 weeks he got into a routine and started sleeping a few more ours through the night. But then as the months went on and he got a bit older, his behaviour through the day became really bad, he was always really active and boisterous, like would fall over and hurt himself and never cry (if anything do it again on purpose) but I always put it down to him being a boy, but he started getting aggressive. Hitting his sister and us, pulling her hair, throwing things. He also has never played with toys, he just throws them. The health visitor done his 18 month check and he was really behind, especially with his speech, even now he’s 2.5 and he says mum and a couple more words, but it’s not really in context and he doesn’t pronounce the words properly (more just makes the sound), the health visitor noticed that he paces back and forth a lot, is constantly like flexing his hands and doesn’t always respond to his name. He also has always had problems with food and I told her about his tantrums (that still got on to this day) that last up to an hour, so she put in a referral. I’m still waiting for this appointment but I’m just kind of at a loss, I try my best for him but it’s so hard. He has since started hurting himself when he gets upset, jumps as high as he can and seat drops on hard floor and head buts the walls. In some ways it’s getting abit easier as he gets older because he now takes my hand and guides me to what he wants etc but it’s also getting harder to manage him as he gets bigger. All of a sudden he HATES his pram, which was the only safety when out, and he’s so strong he can get out of it no matter how tight the straps are and will scream and scream and literally meltdown until you get him out, pretty much everywhere we go that isn’t home is over stimulating for him and he freaks out or tries to run away unless we’re on a walk or doing something outdoorsy. But people around me and strangers make comments that he’s just a naughty boy and he shouldn’t behave like that, does this sound behavioural to you or does it sound like more? I think I just second guess myself as I’m such an over thinker but I will never stop advocating for my baby, anyway thank you for reading if you made it this far, I think I just needed to get it all of my chest