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Worries about 22 months old toddler

1 reply

Mumtobe202310 · 24/08/2025 07:26

Hi All,
I have a 22 month old boy.
I had a normal pregnancy and birth and he was born full term literally came on his due date.
I have had a shaky and diffocult postpartum experience with arguments with husband and also when i went to my parents issues there also.

One time around 16 months old, he fell and banged his head on the brass part that seperates the sitting room from the passage. I dodnt see exactly how it happened althiugh he was right in front of me! But he was trying to push his walker the ones you push over that brass part and i dont know whether he fell over the walker or if he slipped and fell forward and banged his head. This guilt is so so heavy i cannot explain. He cried and immediatelt there was a bruise and i put ice pack for 20 mins and couldnt see any bruises after. But still i am always thinking whay if that may have caused any brain injury and effected his devlopment etc?

Within these 22 months my son bless him had to witness me crying and breakjng down many times and also heard loud voices and arguments (i tried putting tv volume loud by putting his show on too to distract) and also doors have been banged by others out of anger with him being near proximity.

The guilt and sadness and pain i feel because i couldnt just remove myself from these places hurt me immensely.

However, the sadness is coming from my worry aswell relating to his behaviour.

He is a lovely boy who loves reading here and there, loves toys and water play etc. He loves Ms Rachel and Puffin Rock on Netflix and loves Mr Tumble nyrsery rhymes and a recent one is Ms Apple.

He loves swings and roudabouts and jumping and climbing etc.

However, he still cant speak yet. He says maybe 4 words, 2 of which are pronounced correctly and other 2 not quite there yet bless him.
The speech doesnt worry me. However, he does this thing where he clenches his teeth and shakes and also sometimes comes behind me and swueezes me from behind and digs his nails into my skin. Think of it ad an overexcited hug!
He also sometimes runs up and thrashes onto my couch. He stiffens his body and moves his limbs in a jerky way sometimes too. These rrally worry me because im thinking what if all the stuff he already wentthriugh such as when he banged his ehad and also the other arguments and stuff i mentioned effected his brain and development?

I recorded clips and showed my GP. He got referred to paeditrician and they said in meantime he should get a speech and language therapist for which there is a wait. But also said a community paediatrician will get in touch. Its nearly been a year and all i heard from them is that SALT has a long wait so looking ahout 2 years.

I am extremely sad and its exhausting carrying it all inside especially as someone who has Post Natal Depression so wanted to ask on here if anyone has any experience with this?
Thank you in advance x

OP posts:
BunnyRuddington · 25/08/2025 07:16

Are you have in a safer place now @Mumtobe202310 away from arguments and stress?

And are you getting any help for your PNI and anxiety?

You can mention to the Community Paediatric team about the head bump but I very much doubt you’ve caused brain damage to your DS.

My DS had head bumps as a baby and toddler and is ND but I had never once thought that I’d caused it. ASD and ADHD, if he does have either of those, are genetic so a head bump won’t have caused them.

You can get some more help though.

I would get in touch with your HV and mention the referrals to SaLT and the Community Paediatrics but also ask for a hearing test for your DS as the SaLT want him to have had one to rule out Glue Ear or general low hearing.

I would also ask for a referral to Portage and Occupational Therapy.

The HV might be able to tell you of some support groups for parents with SN Children and there may even be a playgroup. In our area we’re very lucky that there is a SN Nursery run by a charity.

Definitely speak to your HV about your home situation and the anxiety you’ve been experiencing too Flowers

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