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Original poster

5 year old cries at *everything*

15 replies

lilyelodie · 27/05/2008 19:07

I am at my wits end on what to do to resolve this - my DS is 5 and cries at absolutely everything that doesn't go his way (this evening for example,he started because I said the cushions from the sofa would need tidying before they went to bed). I have tried
a) ignoring it
b) asking why it is so serious it needs to be cried about
c) explaining that crying about everything makes it difficult to know when something is serious
d)getting irriated about it
the crying does not get him his own way!

there is a lot going on at the moment, DC3 on the way, building work, a very confident and demanding DC2... but i always try to make sure he has some 'me' time (both on his own and with me) but this continual bursting into tears is doing my head in - any ideas?? please!

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LyraSilvertongue · 27/05/2008 19:09

Nothing useful to say except my five-year-old is the same. It's really irritating, especially as DS2 doesn't cry unless it's something serious.

FrannyandZooey · 27/05/2008 19:10

I think I would be trying to be very reassuring and accepting tbh
I don't think he is doing it to be annoying
sounds like everything a little overwhelming for him right now, can you give him lots of extra comfort and love? you don't need to give in on the things that are making him cry, eg tidying up, but be very kind about it and not make the getting upset a discipline issue
it could become a vicious circle otherwise from the sound of it?

very wearing for you though esp while pg, I sympathise

3littlefrogs · 27/05/2008 19:12

I think you have answered your own question. He sounds stressed out/overwhelmed.

You are doing the right thing by trying to ensure he has time with you on his own.

Do you ever just get down to his level and ask him gently and kindly why he is sad/upset?

Maybe you could empathise a bit and say that everybody feels upset by little things sometimes, and usually it is because maybe they are worried about something, tired, not feeling well etc. then give hima cuddle and allow him to tell you how he feels?

When I get stressed with life generally, it is often the little things that tip me over the edge.

3littlefrogs · 27/05/2008 19:14

X posted with everyone else.

Original poster
lilyelodie · 27/05/2008 19:16

Thanks Lyra - makes me feel (marginally) better to know it is not an isolated case, yes, agree that my DS2 seems to take things a lot more in his stride too..

Franny, apprecite your point, he does get LOADS of love and attention, and i really try not to get annoyed about it but there are times, when he has burst into tears for the 15th time in an hour (or so it feels) that i do just tell him to stop crying. not most constructive - but human... still, will perserve with the L&A and hopefully as things settle down so will this.

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FluffyMummy123 · 27/05/2008 19:16

Message withdrawn

3littlefrogs · 27/05/2008 19:18

Has he recently started school?

Original poster
lilyelodie · 27/05/2008 19:20

He started school in September - really enjoys it and yes, i can see that the more i write, the less suprising it is.

icod - me too!!!

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LyraSilvertongue · 27/05/2008 19:20

I think tiredness is the problem with DS1. He's at his worst in the hour before bedtime. School gets to see the best of him and I get the tired and emotional bits. DS2 seems not to need sleep as much so gets less emotional.

3littlefrogs · 27/05/2008 19:23

They do get awfully tired once they are at school - especially after or during a growth spurt. You might need to move bedtime forward an hour.

jellyforbrains · 27/05/2008 19:27

This sounds exactly like my DS (aged nearly 4). We too have a DC2, a DC3 on the way soon and lots of building work going on!

He has started doing this and it is driving me mad. Is whingeing about things that he never would have done before - say if we go for a long walk he will complain a lot, whereas before he would walk for ages without getting tired.

Have tried all approaches like you have so these answers have been interesting. Things have been getting a bit much for me so hadn't thought that it would be the same for him too!

Original poster
lilyelodie · 27/05/2008 19:33

Bedtime - hmm... have actually had to push it out because DS1&2 are currently sharing a room and wouldn't go to sleep unless i put them to bed later. Later means i nbed and lights out by 8pm and he is generally awake by 7-7.30, but does sometimes sleep til 9 or so (happy to let him when there is no school!). Sounding like he just needs what i do - lots of sleep, hopefully 1/2 term will help (at least temporarily) and by summer hols things should be more settled (with the exception of the new arrival in August to start it all up again)...

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janx · 27/05/2008 19:34

I am so with you - my dd - 3.5 cries at the drop of a hat or has a tantrum. It has got so bad that the nursery is suggesting we have a meeting with them. Tonight she cried because I took her vest of the wrong way, I called her pj bottoms trousers and I didn't include one of her bears in all the people who love her song...... I have a baby of 5 months and I think that is the cause of it - that and tiredness - am going to push the boat out now and have a shandy - wowee

FrannyandZooey · 27/05/2008 19:34

yes of course it is terribly irritating when you are tired as well
I didn't mean to suggest he wasn't getting enough L+A, just that EVEN MORE might help this stage pass more quickly?

Original poster
lilyelodie · 27/05/2008 20:03

Hadn't taken offence on L&A - will try just being more patient - lots of deep breaths for me. thanks for the advice

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