My SIL and BIL (DH brother) have a lovely soon to be 4 year old DD. She will be starting school next year (August baby), she is non verbal, she has stimming behaviour, sensory issues and is not yet potty trained. My SIL and BIL (plus all that side of the family) repeat that it’s because she is an August baby and she hasn’t gone to nursery/pre- school so she’s sensitive around other people/her cousins. They aren’t intending to send her to pre school, as SIL is a SAHM.
I think it is clear DN has ASD, others have mentioned it to SIL and BIL (class teachers at baby classes, which were swiftly stopped) and they’ve said it’s not true - they are fully supported by all other family members in their view. They are looking around local schools for next year. I am just wondering, is there a moment that this might get picked up before she starts school. I know it’s none of my business, but I worry she is going to really struggle at mainstream school - especially with no ECHP. DH has said not to raise it, as it will go down like a lead balloon. I’ve mentioned in passing, conversationally, that other ND children I know and the similarities - the response is always that DN is just catching up, she’s an August baby, she’s developing etc.
I guess my question is, if DN is not going to pre school, all HV checks are done, when could this be picked up? Or would SIL and BIL need to raise it themselves.