4 Year Old worried about dying

[Amandella]

My two dds aged 4 and 10 were watching a kids DVD when someone died (can't remember who!)... My dd aged 4 said something like "why has she died" and my dd aged 10 said very matter-of-factly "everyone dies in the end". There ensued a massive argument with youngest dd saying that was rubbish and she wasn't going to die and the conversation escalated until I put a stop to it by calling them for tea... Now my youngest is very upset about dying - she keeps asking me when she's going to die, what happens, where does she go, where will mummy & daddy be and then she keeps bursting into tears at all sorts of times (particularly when she's gone quiet and starts thinking). I have tried to tell her that it's nothing to be scared of and yes, we do all die but we will all be together again etc etc... it's so difficult but it's become an obsession and she just keeps on about it.
Any words of wisdom please. I feel terrible that she's so upset but I don't really want to lie to her, but she is only 4. Help.

I found that if your open and honest with your child they have a better understanding, I explained to my son that heaven is a place where we all meet up after we have passed, so it's only a temporary good bye, we lost his baby sister aged 3 days old at hospital, but he knows she is an angel in heaven who he will see again when he goes to heaven, I hope this helps

I made the mistake of telling my DS age 4 thet when his grandad died last summer, he went to heaven "in the sky". Lots of tears, lots of talking about him. Last week he came home from school with a bean to plant to make a bean stalk. He told me that its going to grow right into the sky, then he can climb up it and see grandad. They can't understand death at this age I'm sure of it. Blimey, we cant so why should they!