6 year old being mean to another kid.

[Shells]

DS1 has been best friends with child 1 since before xmas. In the last few weeks he has hooked up with child 2 in his class and they are now thick as thieves. This is all fine, except that they are deliberately and meanly excluding child 1 from their play.

I find it so awful and I don't know if I'm over-reacting or what my role should be. I've tried to talk to DS1 about being kind and not excluding other kids. But all he says is 'we just want him to find another friend so we can play on our own. He's annoying us'.

Any ideas of how to get the message through to him that you can't hurt another child's feelings? I'm just gutted that he is behaving like this.

I have watched my child be the one excluded in similar circumstances and have come to the conclusion that there is nothing I or anyone else can do. Yes, you have to give your children instructions about what is acceptable or not but frankly you can't make them play with someone they don't want to. I think that it is probably for my son and those like him who need to develop better social skills to survive. I also think that I get far too involved in the doings of 5 year olds!

I know what you mean GL and thanks for replying. My first instinct is to ring up all the parents and teachers and try and sort it out for them! But I know I can't. And it wouldn't help. And as you say, I can't force him to play with anyone. Its the mean-ness that gets me. But is there a nice way of saying 'we don't want to play with you?'.

Anyone else?