Any tips for moany/whiney 6yo?

[Eddiehollymillie]

My son turned 6 last week. He’s my firstborn and only son (2 DD) and from a young age he’s been a partially moany/whiney child. He was born via forceps and was a very unsettled baby so basically moody since birth 😂 he peaked at 3.5yo and by 4 and starting school, things did calm down. We had baby no3 last march and he’s a great big brother, never been jealous and very loving. He just has these very big emotions but we don’t know what’s setting him off. He’s happy at school, doing really well and loves going but the minute we pick him up everything he does is moany, he’s unhappy and generally just very, very moody.
Am I getting it wrong somewhere? I’m losing it (I know I shouldn’t) but the noise is triggering for me so I know I need to breathe through it but at 6, I genuinely thought more verbal communication and less whining would happen.
Any kind and helpful tips would be much appreciated 🙂

Is he doing it in a whiney voice? Is Thats what bothering you?

I'd try a dual approach, I think. Firstly, you get nothing you whinge for. 'Say that again nicely, please, and then we can X', absolutely consistently. Eventually you graduate to just raising eyebrows at them most of the time and they try again in a normal tone of voice.

Secondly, but at least as important, it sounds like after school you need a plan to help him re-regulate. Is he hungry? My five year old is currently in a growth spurt, and I've started carrying emergency snacks after a couple of spectacular strops that turned out to be hunger. Otherwise (or in addition) what helps him let go of the stresses of the day and feel good? That might be tearing around the play park or a stint on the trampoline, or it might be colouring, lego, or a bit of screentime. For us, it's very often the last, even in non-growth-spurt times, 20-30 minutes of snack and television, and then we do other things.