Hi all,
I have a 19 month old son.
He is a full term baby and I gave birth vaginally. No issues during pregnancy too.
My son has never been one to make much eye contact and I didnt think much of it until recently.
He is able to walk etc and fine and gross motor skills are fine.
He was late in crawling and walking but caught up.
However, my concerns are regarding his lack of eye contact and also speech.
He hardly makes eye contact. I can't get him to sit with me to sing nursery rhymes to him etc.He will sometimes join in but very rarely as in when its wind the bobbin up...clap clap clap he will clap.
He used to hum along so well to ms Rachel songs and puffin rock theme tune and we used so hum and shake rattles together but for many ths suddenly it stopped.
Few months ago I noticed him stiffening his body arms and legs so tightly when trying to give him shower etc or when trying to rock him to sleep. It concerned me and it became more frequent. He started also doing this thing where he would clench his teeth and shake his body.
I went to GP and showed them a video and they referred him to paediatrician whom we saw last week. They said the community paediatrician will be in touch and speech and language therapist. Today he has been finding it harder to regulate as in he was like pinching me while I was trying to open my top to get him to nurse. He often does this anyways but today I noticed more strength. What broke me though was suddenly he took his forearm and started to bite. At first I thought he was sucking it and as soon as I had a thought he may bite I quickly moved it and lo and behold he actually had a bite imprint on his arm and it crushed my soul. My heart hurts writing this.
I held it together for these last few days but today...I broke down. My son was sleeping and I was cooking while watching him on baby monitor and crying on floor.
I cried to God and said whatever it may be I accept it but I just want my son to be happy and well.
I am so sad today and my heart feels heavy. I have been blaming myself for all sorts such as not having g been able to take him out much to socialise with others or have fun with others during his first year (I have PND and also was facing abuse from ex husband). I also blame myself and feel guilty for some head bumps he had in past too. I also feel guilty for sometimes breaking down in front of him crying although I'd pull myself quickly back together or cry while hugging him so he doesnt see my tears. I blame myself for allowing myself to be in a situation where he saw me get screamed at and hit although he wasmt even a year old. I feel like all these together has led to these behaviours in him.
I just wanted to share this and ask for any help. Has anyone had a child or children who was like this? And how are they doing now? Are they well and happy?
Thank you in advance sorry for any incoherent writing.