Help, need advice on baby hitting and throwing

[Firsttimemummie]

Hi mums,

just here for some advice, I have a 15mo, nearly 16, and he’s starting to throw toys around and ignore us when we’re telling him no. I get to his level and tell him no that’s not nice be gentle, he just starts to hit me in the face and it doesn’t matter how much i move his hands and explain it’s naughty, he does it more. He’ll even purposely start throwing things and does everything he knows what he’s not allowed to do ( basically a strop).he also tests us with eating, he’ll start throwing his food on the floor and if I give him a mouthful of food, he blows raspberries (I have never taught him that whilst eating)I’m a first time mum and I feel like I’ve done something wrong? Did I mummy him too much? Any advice will be appreciated because I’m feeling lost on what to do.

thank you <3

You’ve not done anything wrong - hitting is a really normal phase they go through. They don’t have the ability to communicate how they feel verbally so often they react physically to things.
Try to work out when he does it, like what triggers it. So my 2 year old will do it when he’s a bit overwhelmed, or not been allowed to do something he wants to and having a tantrum. If we get too close to him during those times then he’ll hit us, because we’re within reach. I find that if we give him a bit of space then he’s less likely to hit us. Imagine if you were really angry and someone comes close to you and tries to reason with you. It might make you more angry and without the ability to say go away you’ll probably lash out.
I don’t totally know what to do to stop it except being consistent. Saying no, removing yourself from being within reach of being hit. And as he gets older you can start talking through it and why it’s wrong etc.

I think the language you’re using maybe a bit too advanced. If they were throwing at that age I’d see it as a sign to change what we’re doing. Distraction is probably your best solution at this age.

Same with eating, if they start to blow raspberries or drop food they’ve probably had enough to eat. Just ignore and clear up. Unless there’s a delay meaning that you’re still feeding them instead of letting them feed themselves?

If he starts throwing toys, tell him to stop doing that or you'll take his toys. When he does that again, take his toys for a day. It's better for punishment to be logical and immediate.

if he wants to throw food, tell him that food goes into the tray or in the mouth. If he starts throwing food, end the meal, because he's obviously not hungry. But it is good to tell him that food goes into the tray or in the mouth, just as a warning. Then stop the meal if they start to misbehave.

My husband and I have trained ourselves to go full and unreactive when our son gets like that.

We just say, "no, that's boring", and then move him away/remove whatever is being thrown/hit. They're trying out cause and effect, and if the effect is boring, they'll soon not bother.