How wary of other people are your dcs?

[notnowbernard]

DD1 (4.5) - not shy. Will approach ANYONE (adult, child, baby, dog) and initiate a conversation

Invites herself along to play, or to join their picnic that sort of thing

Will ask a total stranger on a park bench what the book they are reading is about

I think it's lovely (am sure social convention will bash it out of her sooner or later) but do wonder sometimes when that awareness will kick in, when she will pick up that people don't always want to be approached or bombarded with questions

How do you feel when someone like DD1 approaches you?

DS1 is a bit like your DD.
DD is shy, hides behind us and looks sideways at new people for ages.

I usually let DS chat for a couple of sentences and then say something like 'perhaps this man would like to carry on reading his book'. If they really want to carry on chatting (some people do) they usually say, 'It's ok' and carry on answering his questions.

I don't mind it when strange children chat to me like that (and didn't mind before I had DS either). Since I have had DS I have got better at politely asking them to leave me alone when I have had enough!

dd1 used to be like that. She gradually stopped.

My dd is the same.

She cracks me up in shops, she will regularly stop a sales assitant and ask for help. Once we were in Sainsbury's doing the weekly shop and she asked someone doing the shelf stacking to recommend the best desert to her ( she was 5 at the time).

Yes, she's always telling people about OUR lives as well as enquiring about their own

DS likes to tell everyone exactly how old I am!

Agree, Turniphead

DD1 has a direct and to-the-point style

Will approach a picnicking family, sit down and say "Hello, I'm dd1. What's in your sandwiches? I like cheese, too. Can I have some?"

Invites herself in to play with the (various) neighbours on a regular basis

I could go on

"Hello, what's your name? I'm dd2. We've just been to the cafe for lunch, and my brother and sister came too, they're bigger than me. I'm 4, and my brother's 8 and my sister's 13, and she goes to big school. In the summer we're going to France on a holiday and there's going to be a swimming pool. I like swimming, but I only like it with armbands, and I don't go in the deep water, or you might drown. It would'nt be nice to drown, would it? What's your dog called? I like dogs, but only nice dogs, not big scarey bitey dogs. Does your dog bite? What does he eat? He's a nice dog isn't he? Can I pat him. He likes it when I pat him, doesn't he? But you have to pat dogs nicely, don't you, otherwise they will be cross with you. And if they're cross with you they might bite you."

And so forth, till one of us drags her away.

Frogs

ds (5) is like this
I think on the whole it is a good thing but have seen people who obviously don't want to be bothered with it
atm I am with him most of the time so can step in, but am trying to begin to teach etiquette about not carrying on the conversation if the other person isn't saying much
eg if he is talking loads and the other person is just looking, or saying 'mmm', then they don't want to talk, and it's time to say goodbye

mine goes on at anyone that will listen. he just asked the woman next door how long she'll be cutting the grass as it's too noisy. drives me mad.

I think I notice it with dd1 because she is the one among her peers who is most like it, therefore I wonder exactly how 'normal' it is (also, I don't think dd2 is going the same way as dd1, has more wariness of strangers)

Am also introducing the ideas around social 'rules'... ie if a family are sitting together eating, maybe we should wait until they've finished before making friends with them... if someone is reading, maybe they don't want to be disturbed... let's not tell the woman in the shoe shop about the contents of our ear infection

Turniphead1 - I so agree with you. Its really shaming to watch strangers listen and respond with interest .

SEA, that would be a typical dd1 comment also

She is particularly interested in our childless neighbour, and questions her relentlessly about everything. Am noticing it more because of the lovely weather, out in the garden lots... we have a v low garden wall and there is no privacy for our poor neighbours

every staff member in tesco knows all about my dd1 and our family she will talk to any one and every one and can even remember their name

dd1 to random stranger hello mrs so and so
me do you know her?
dd1 yes she is my friend we were talking in tesco last week remember!?

I love children like this! I overheard a little girl (about 4 or 5 years old I guess) calling out to a man in the carpark at the supermarket last week "Hi Brian, how are the lads?!" and so on...Her mum waited for her to finish chewing the fat (long-suffering look on her face ).

A friend of a friend's little boy "how are you getting on at weight-watchers Eileen?"