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4 year old fascinated with ‘private parts’

2 replies

HanS326 · 23/03/2025 22:02

Since joining reception in September my DS has been involved in a lot of situations where various kids (him included) are showing ‘private parts’ to one another. I cannot work out if DS is the instigator or not, or even what is true or not as this is of course a memory of a 4 year old.

Each week at a very random time of day (eg bedtime) he will tell me about a time when it’s happened. He seems to tell me weeks after it has happened and it seems a lot of the time the teachers don’t even realise it’s happened as the kids are alone in the toilets together.

DS went to nursery from being age 1-4 and never did anything like this in nursery or out, so whilst I can’t be certain, I feel like this is behaviour he’s learned at school. He’s a great kid but also can easily get incredibly carried away and is very impressionable.

I’m not sure how concerned to be, or how to react when he tells me, I try to be matter of fact and repeat the pants rules, I’ve bought age appropriate books about privacy and reminded him if he has any questions he can ask me, and if it happens again there will be consequences etc. He seems very happy to accept all this at home but I can’t be there at school to remind him.

i don’t know if I’m drawing too much attention to it all but at the same time I really do not want this to continue. Any suggestions on how to handle this that have worked in the past?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
OneNewOchreTurtle · 23/03/2025 22:55

It sounds like you are doing the right thing. At safeguarding training this is said to be normal for this age. You could mention to the teachers so they know to keep an eye if the kids are staying in the toilets long etc.

Natasha198 · 25/03/2025 11:36

Sorry i don't have any exact experience of this but my DS keeps going on about private parts at the moment. Asking about them quite a lot in the day, or trying to show me his /pointing to mine. We've had a few family members laugh when he's done it, and so, because he loves the attention, thinks he should continue. We've told those family members to not laugh, and just react plainly. I agree that they are his private parts, tell him he shouldn't be showing them to people and then move on. He seems to be getting bored as there's a boring tone to my voice! Sorry, not sure what use that was but there you are 😂

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