Someone please help me before I lose the plot with dd (8)

[blinkingthreetimes]

I sound really selfish now but I can't cope anymore ,her behaviour is shocking ,she does have mild sn (we think dyspraxia).
She is our eldest girl and has such an awful temper today she kicked off all through dinner and then when dp eventually took her to her room she called him a fat C**T

Noone ever uses that word in this house so don't know where she got it from I have made her stay in bed but she isn't bothered and I know she is going to start again soon .

I am finding it very hard ATM and noone except dp realises what a hard time I am having with her.

Not sure what advice I am asking for just want to vent really

Sorry to hear you're having such a hard time. It is not easy to deal with behaviour like that.

You say she is the eldest; what ages are your other children?

My son is the eldest he is 10 ,

my other dd's are 7 ,5 and 2

she is 8

Thanks for replying x

It is hard to imagine that some one who is bringing up 5 children can ever be called selfish. Wow, that sounds like hard work.

My 11 yo dd throws tantrums sometimes. She is that bit older than your dd, and has no SNs, but what I did the other day was put my arms around her and give her a cuddle to try and calm her down before dealing with the event that triggered the temper. I was able to do that because I hadn't been coping with her all day.

If you and dp are both finding it difficult, have you thought of finding out what her behaviour is like at school, and discussing the matter with teachers? If she has undiagnosed SEN I suspect her teacher is having a hard time with her too. Dyspraxia covers a multitude of behaviours, often challenging ones.

When we (that is, dh and I) punish by using time out, we usually make it a very short time and then call the culprit back and get them to face up to their behaviour ("why were you sent to the corner?").

Sounds like your dd is frustrated - what about, I don't know. I think it also helps behaviour if a child gets enough exercise to be good and tired at bedtime.

Good luck