Eye contact 4 montgs

[Oakley0110]

Hi
i am looking for some reassurance of good stories to give me a bit of hope

my baby has just turned 4 months but will not look at me while on my knee but lying playing good eye contact and engaging even in his car seat good contact but just not when on my knee

my HV confirmed this and said it wasn’t a good sign

since then I’ve felt sick and feel I can’t bond well with baby and I can’t sleep I keep googling and it all comes up with the same answer

has anyone had a baby like this?
he is almost rolling, he is giggling but not all the time and smiles and coos

or do you have experience with it your baby was like this and we’re diagnosed

i feel Iike it’s stealing the joy away form being a mum and even though I know this I can’t stop it coming into my head continuously

I’m getting help for my anixety too as it turned very bad since the HV confirmed

thank you

My baby was exactly the same. Would refuse to look at me when being held. He would actively avoid eye contact, I could tell it made him uncomfortable like too much sensory input or something. He would happily look at me laying down on his mat or anywhere else- just not my lap. He’s now a perfectly healthy 11 year old.

@Namechangenoidea

thank you - can you remember when it got better! It’s making me not want visitors as that’s all they do pick him up and chase him about and I sit so upset

appreciate you taking the time to reply

Please reach out to your HV. They are really responsive and can do a review again

Sorry ignore this response, it's on the wrong thread!!! Not sure how to delete

Your baby might be looking at other things that have caught their eye, remember their eyesight is developing all the time so maybe they can see new things!

I have a 4 month old who sometimes doesn’t look at me and I think it’s totally normal as my oldest was the same and she’s a totally normal 5 year old. The health visitor was cruel saying that to you but not offering any solution. Please try not to worry x

Hey @Oakley0110 any updates on your LO? My 3.5m old avoids eye contact at all costs and it’s really troubling me

@AlwaysSeekingComfort he is the same engaged from a distance but rarely while up close on my lap. I spent two months in severe anxiety mode but he is waving ans clapping and crawling about and is 9 months old. I just have to keep everything crossed he is going to keep developing and learning

I would say try not to worry too much it ruins your time with them. It stole a good couple of months where I couldn’t not think about it I couldn’t sleep etc but worrying doesn’t change anything either. not the best advice as I do still worry but 3.5 months is so young and probably taking in everything else around them - they are so nosy and just beginning to see further so try not to worry x

@Oakley0110 thanks for the response!
my LO is also behind on other milestones too! Doesn’t lift head up at all on tummy time :((
I am really trying not to worry :( it’s hard to engage with them and share smiles when they will not even look at you.

@AlwaysSeekingComfort does your little one engage when lying down?
3.5 months is a hard age as they are beginning to see other things and would struggle
ro focus for anytime I’m sure everything will be ok try not to worry as hard as it is as they will all do things in own time. My little boy hated tummy time and use to have face down crying!