Think I've finally hit the wall with dd(3) behaviour. She's always refused to drink (a cup of milk from 6 months old could take an hour to drink) is tiny but very very strong willed and will do anything to win. Her behaviour issues seem to be about being in control but she will scream and cry and vomit when she loses, literally doing nothing all day as a consequence. Her behaviour at nursery is 'normal for her age' and they are not concerned but we get nothing done at home on her non nursery days (it can take till 11am to have breakfast a shower and get dressed) and it's really impacting on us having any life as a family and mine and dh's relationship. We don't go out or have days out (she can't and won't behave and we don't have any confidence in being able to do anything safety as she will run etc). I'm starting to dread her non nursery days but don't want to put her there more as she copies others and we didn't have kids to send them away full time (personal choice obviously) although would rather work more to fund more hours at the moment if this behaviour continues. We've been to the doctors who were no help at all and expressed concern to health visitor who has referred us to neurodiversity assessment but I am not really convinced it is this at all and feels more behaviour related - she can do it and voices that she doesn't want to behave at home. Everything she is asked/told to do is met with a no or don't want to..... left to her own devices she would not drink anything all day and her behaviour gets so much worse when she doesn't drink. I think she needs some sort of behaviour therapy and we probably need some training and strategies to deal with her better but am struggling to find anyone who will work with a 3 year old in this way.... and suggestions or signposting? There's probably more and I'm not drip feeding but can't type out 3 years of 'will this work' ..... we are currently on iron supplements and have been using magnesium butter. She's very social and can be kind, loving and empathetic - she can also be selfish, defiant and horrible - I love her but cannot stand her behaviour much longer and something needs to change!