My almost 5 yr old D/D has always been 'full of beans' and bright but to be honest, challenging to parent.
Behaviours that we put down to 'toddler-isms' dont seem to be going anywhere. She started school in September and things seem to be getting worse by the week. We are exploring the possibility that she might need some additional support and that there may be neurodivergence.
Throughout the years the behaviours have included-
- advanced speech as a toddler but now has speech delay requiring speech therapy.
- constant talking
- Asks questions, gets an answer but it doesnt seem to register then asks the same question again
- since dropping her naps as a toddler would never fall asleep/relax on sofa regardless of how tired. She will just keep going and going. Only exception to this is if strapped in car seat.
- humming/singing whilst doing activities (although this seems to be reducing)
- very rarely plays independently and if we are not playing with her she just follows myself/husband round the house despite a playroom and bedroom full of toys.
- difficulty waiting turns in conversations
- when tired/tantrumming repeats the same question repeatedly
- sensory issues with hair washing, brushing (i use a tangle brush with oil yet she says im hurting her even if im sectioning her ponytail into a plait with my fingers) and getting water on her face. (Weirdly this is not an issue during swimming lessons)
- low tolerance to pain, will have an unnecessary reaction to minor injuries for example hysteria about removing a plaster.
- upset by loud noises (especially hand dryers in toilets but can tolerate them)
- sensitive to temperature in bath, often says its too hot.
- sensitive to some clothes. Complains that things are itchy, often has issues with shoes.
- often climbing on/jumping off furniture
- picking her nails and lip constantly
- sensitive to perceived negativity, having a lot of playground dramas and gets offended easily.
- emotional outbursts and temper tantrums
- has little awareness when hugging, will repeatedly squeeze too tight/hug round neck
- needs snacks constantly, doesnt seem to feel full.
- Night wakings
However-
-She could sit through a whole film at cinema (rarely can if at home) or pantomime show at theatre.
- can colour and draw for ages with no distraction
- can take turns and wait in games
- Is not impulsive or a risk taker
- Will happily sit and do school work, according to her teacher is getting on fine academically.
- friendly and sociable
The tantrums and dramatics are what we are struggling with the most at the moment and we are finding it increasingly difficult to know how to discipline her as nothing seems to work.. she simply does not listen..today she threw a chair at her Dad. I would say she has a screaming tantrum 4 times a day on average with throwing things/kicking doors etc.
We are always conscious to consider overtiredness/illness/hunger and give leeway for that but I just feel like her outbursts dont seem to be in line with her peers.
Does anyone with experience of ADHD find any of these characteristics are relatable? Or are these just age appropriate behaviours?
Thanks