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Original poster

Will my baby regress when in-laws stay?!!

6 replies

AKM22 · 01/12/2024 08:39

The PILs are staying 4 weeks over Christmas.
It will definitely be unsettling for me but they have no boundaries and will interfere with my parenting decisions.
I'm worried this will hinder my babies routine and behaviour then I will be the one picking up the pieces when they have left

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SuperSleepyBaby · 01/12/2024 18:36

it shouldn't have any impact at all on your baby. What age is your baby?

it does sound stressful for you though. Maybe put some clear, reasonable boundaries in place for things that are important to you and stick by them - and try to survive the 4 weeks.

bilbodog · 01/12/2024 18:41

Any way they can stay in a hotel? Thats a long time for any visitors! I would be suicidal if anyone stayed that long!

TinyMouseTheatre · 02/12/2024 07:03

Agree that 4 weeks sounds very, very long. Are they visiting from the other side of the world?

Original poster
AKM22 · 06/12/2024 18:18

Yes they are visiting from abroad and haven't looked after a child for over 30 years so they are quite out of touch and have no boundaries!
I'm hoping it will go quick!

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sel2223 · 07/12/2024 02:15

In my personal experience, yes, it has an impact.

My PIL live in a different country and are from a very different culture and religion to me. MIL has 5 children but raised them so differently from the western way that i was brought up knowing. We disagree on pretty much every single aspect of parenting.

DD1 is now 4 and we have had many, many battles over the years - there's no malice, it's just that in her culture, everything is passed down and taught from generation to generation. Mother knows best etc even when it flies directly in the face of actual science backed research and professional advice (off the top of my head we disagreed on BLW, empty cot/ safe cot, self soothing, baby not over heating, me not co-sleeping, having any routine whatsoever - mothers and newborns don't even leave the house for the first 40 days in her culture so even going for a walk in the first few weeks was a battle).

Hubby tries to be the peacemaker in the middle bless him.

When she visits (or we visit her) I would say it takes us a good week to get back on track afterwards.

Original poster
AKM22 · 08/12/2024 17:17

sel2223 · 07/12/2024 02:15

In my personal experience, yes, it has an impact.

My PIL live in a different country and are from a very different culture and religion to me. MIL has 5 children but raised them so differently from the western way that i was brought up knowing. We disagree on pretty much every single aspect of parenting.

DD1 is now 4 and we have had many, many battles over the years - there's no malice, it's just that in her culture, everything is passed down and taught from generation to generation. Mother knows best etc even when it flies directly in the face of actual science backed research and professional advice (off the top of my head we disagreed on BLW, empty cot/ safe cot, self soothing, baby not over heating, me not co-sleeping, having any routine whatsoever - mothers and newborns don't even leave the house for the first 40 days in her culture so even going for a walk in the first few weeks was a battle).

Hubby tries to be the peacemaker in the middle bless him.

When she visits (or we visit her) I would say it takes us a good week to get back on track afterwards.

Edited

Thank you for your reply.

I am in a similar situation. In-laws are from abroad coming to stay. Son culture but very different thinking generational differences and different beliefs on how to raise MY child.
They have no boundaries, they are completely dependent on my husband when visiting us.
I don't know how to react politely when the MIL will try and control and override my decisions. I'm trying not to get worked up but it really upsets me they type of people they are. Also I don't want to fight with my husband I love him and just want time together with my little family. But my PILs don't care about our marriage just the grandchild not realising the best thing for a child is a happy mother and father

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