Hi, I'm posting here for advice on who the hell I need to see to get help. We have 2 boys, one almost 3 and the other 9 months. Our 9 month old hasn't been a good sleeper since the day he was born. Been told numerous times 'it's just a phase'. Well it's not getting better. At all. And I physically and mentally cannot cope anymore. Our eldest went through phases but this is not a phase. He fights going to sleep for hours and hours upon end. Every. Single. Day/night. Every single night we go through the same thing of him screaming, fighting, thrashing around until he finally gives in. And if he doesn't wake Every half an hour to an hour all night and we do actually manage to get 3/4( if we're lucky) hours in a row. He then wakes up and like tonight has been awake screaming since 11.50...... 4 hours!!!!! He has been screaming and keeping our entire house awake for 4 hours. My partner and I both have to be up for work in 2 hours. Our toddler has nursery. This happens every day and we can't carry on living like this. Last week be woke at 11.15 and was awake until 4.45am..... and the next day slept for a grand total of 2 15 minute naps ALL DAY! This is not normal!? Surely!? We have googled and tried everything we can think of. We have the same routine. He used to co sleep with us but that didn't work, he's in his own room, he has a night light, Ollie the owl white noise machine, I've tried playing soothing music on my phone, lullaby etc, qeve tried silence, cry it out, he then gets himself in so much of a state he urges to be sick. He still wakes for bottles in the night so we thought this could be down to him being hungry but he just wont take to food other than porridge, which I do give him before bed to try and help but it doesn't seem to be working. At around 6 months my partner came home from work and I'd had the frantic screaming all day, it continued through the evening and we phoned 111, they advised him to be seen as could hear the screaming. Which he was, the doctor even got a second opinion but they couldn't find anything wrong and gave us a leaflet on crying babies...... honestly please help. What do we do? Who do we see? I had a panic attack last week as I can see a way through this. I'm not a worrier normally but I feel like our family is falling to pieces, we are all absolutely exhausted and I'm beginning to feel so much resentment and regret at having him which I feel so guilty about even thinking let alone writing here.
Also we do have family thag have offered to have them/him overnight but I feel so guilty putting that onto someone else. My mum cares for my nan during the day so she's exhausted and my sister also works so I'd feel awful putting that tiredness onto someone else.
Sorry for long rant at 4am. I just don't know where to go with this now.