Does your 2 year old/toddler eat the same as you? Tips needed for navigating the fussy phase!

[teaandkittehs]

Hi all,
Just wondering, as the title says. My nearly 23 month old started as a great eater, turned into a good eater, and is now having a fussy phase and rejecting not only new things but some things she used to eat, too. I gather this is relatively normal for her age. We try to give her what we eat so far as possible but sometimes she doesn't like it or it's too spicy or unhealthy for her. I batch cook for her and there are some tried and tested things she always tends to eat, but I'm keen to keep trying to get her to eat everything she used to and new things too. I don't want her stressed at the dinner table though so I think I'm going to have to follow some of the advice I've read and offer some safe foods alongside new or recently rejected things. This seems like it will cause a lot of food waste, but I guess the other side of it is that if we don't keep trying/offering the variety, then she is more likely to stick to a narrow palate longterm. I would be grateful for any advice to help navigate the fussy phase! She used to only get fussy at dinner but sometimes now it's is at lunch too. She's also gone on strike as regards feeding herself most of the time now, too. She needs a pile of toys on her high chair in order to be distracted enough for us to get a few mouthfuls in her. It seems like we are creating bad habits by doing that, too (ever tried feeding a toddler who has their entire farm set including barn and animals balanced on their highchair?!) But at the end of the day she's got to eat something. I realise her appetite is likely decreased at this age due to not growing so much or fast, but some days she only has a good breakfast and the rest is a few mouthfuls at each meal. I'm resistant to giving into letting her snack a lot to make up for it, but I'm also worried about her going hungry, especially when it comes to sleeping at night - she frequently sleeps through and I'm concerned about her waking up at 2am due to hunger. I'll stop now as it's a huge post!

My son is 20 months and we have a similar problem. He eats a decent breakfast and has snacks like yogurt with fruit in the morning. Lunch is hit and miss but dinner is a fail every night.
Theres a couple of meals he’ll normally eat fine, but anything else he completely rejects.
I do sometimes put a food on his plate that he doesn’t like, eg chicken goujons. Usually he doesn’t touch them but one day he ate a piece and then the next day ate a bit more, so that technique definitely does seem to work. I agree it is a faff though having to cook something extra each meal time, or wasting food. We always offer him some of our dinner if we are having something different to him as well. Most of the time he rejects it.
It’s hard seeing them hardly eat anything, especially as it means he basically doesn’t eat any veg or meat most days.
However, at this age I don’t think they can understand consequences of not eating. So if he refuses most of his dinner then we don’t put pressure on, once he’s down from his chair and we’ve cleaned up / he’s playing, we’ll make some toast or yogurt with berries and pretend it’s for me or my husband and let our son actually eat most of it. We don’t offer it to him or give it to him as an alternative meal. He’s basically eating ‘our snack’, but obviously it is really to fill him up before bed!
I think it’s definitely a phase - they’re pushing boundaries and exerting their own decision making etc.