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"Mummy I want to go to the naughty corner" - what do I do now????

30 replies

UpsyDaisyDo · 23/04/2008 18:50

DS 2.7 generally does as he's told and is a good boy but I do try and be strict when he doesn't do things I've asked him to do and have (up until now) used the naughty corner technique successfully when I feel its appropriate. However, just recently after he's done something he knows is wrong he automatically says he wants to go and sit in the corner! I tell him no you only go there when mummy asks you to not when you want to but am starting to think that he actually enjoys sitting on his own facing the plain white wall! He doesn't cry and will sit there without moaning or moving until I go over to him - he does then say sorry and gives me a cuddle so I guess it's not totally ineffective but would appreciate any ideas/methods people have when they discipline their toddlers.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
hellish · 25/04/2008 14:29

Kateoo - i think you have been reading the same book as me .

The OP is worried about not being ín control - I have started to think lately that I really do not want to focus on "controlling" my dc and focus more on helping them think about why something they did was not a good thing to do.

UpsyDaisyDo · 25/04/2008 21:19

Ah thanks oydal! "the step" is a last resort and he only goes there if I've asked him to pick toy up (or stop whatever he was doing that was unacceptable) and he hasn't despite being given a naughty corner warning! More often than not, after his stint/apology/cuddle when I ask him to do what he wasn't doing before he does it. And I'm all for consistency - mixed signals are just confusing for anyone let alone a strong willed toddler.

kate00 I actually hate to think of it as a punishment and want him to understand and empathise with other people. He's a lovely little boy (the majority of the time ) and I just hope the guidance that I'm giving him is OK and that his personality will develop positively.

hellish - you are so right - I hate to think I'm controlling him (or anyone for that matter - that's just not me at all) but by the same token I don't want to be a pushover and let him get away with things that may seem trivial to some of my friends/family but which I don't like to see children doing or feel is bad mannered. PS If there really is a book please let me know

OP posts:
hellish · 25/04/2008 23:53

Upsy - the book I've been reading is called Unconditional Parenting, Moving from
Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason, by Alfie Kohn.

I'm finding it very interesting and he says lots of things that make sense to me. There are quite a few threads on here on the subject, do a search and you'll see lots of opinions on AK
Good Luck

nannyL · 26/04/2008 00:06

ocasioanly my 2 year old takes himself to the step...

i just make it clear that he can sit there if he wants and get off when ever he feels like it and basically ignore him and carry ion what im doing....

he normally gets bored pretty quickly and decided to come back... i also migth talk to him as i go past etc

obviously if he is 'on the step' he sits there has to remain on the step I put him on, gets ignored and cant get off until I say so!

equally sometimes he has a funny five minutes and doesnt want to come into the house.... so he gets sort of dragged into the porch where i leave him until he decides to come out...

tbh he is doing no harm standing in the porch (if thats where he wants to be fine with me) and he can come out whenever he feels like it... record so far 12 mins but normally he has come out within 3 or 4 mins

Elibean · 27/04/2008 16:08

We don't have a naughty step, but we do have a 'quiet place' and dd has been through phases of taking herself there, not because she's 'been naughty' but because she's overwhelmed and needs some space. Seems healthy to me

I agree with Cod, probably needed some P&Q.

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