Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Toddler keeps hitting me

2 replies

Epli · 01/10/2024 11:33

My daughter is 2.5. It's obviously a difficult age, but apart from some tantrums, she is a really cheerful, communicative, and bright child. The only real issue I have with her is that she keeps hitting me.

  1. It happens when we play together, and she is relaxed and happy, and then suddenly she slaps my face. When I say "playing", it's usually something like jigsaw puzzles, singing together, etc. It's not a cry for attention as I fully concentrate on whatever we are doing.
  2. She does not hit anyone else – she attends a nursery, and the staff there have told me this is not an issue. She also doesn't hit her dad.
  3. My partner and I have been very consistent and always say, "No, you can't hit mummy". Depending on the situation, I either put her down on the floor or take a few steps away to signal that I am upset.

There has been no improvement. I managed to get rid of other bad habits, like no feet on the table, and that didn’t take her long to learn, but the hitting has been going on for 8 months now. I think she probably feels safe and wants to test boundaries with me, but is there something I am doing wrong? It's so frustrating – I’m worried I’ll snap at some point.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
PolaroidPrincess · 01/10/2024 19:37

If it's safe, can you leave the room completely and go and make yourself a drink? The lack of attention might stop hit, hopefully?

Natasha198 · 02/10/2024 16:51

I can really sympathise OP. I am having the same issue with my 3yo at the moment, he will hit if he's happy, tired, angry, excited... all of it. It's very frustrating. I have started to look for cues for when he might be about to hit - for example, sometimes we will be playing and he seems so happy so I'll lean forward to kiss him and he'll hit. I realise that he sometimes needs space, so I ask him now for a kiss / cuddle. It's just a new stage that I hadn't realised was happening!

Are there certain times of the day it's worse? DS's is always bath time. We have started to take things away (although not sure he understands the consequence), so I'm not sure if your daughter might be a bit too young? We stopped TV or books before bed, or have taken a favourite toy away for a day. I have also tried being calm, moving away, shouting, time out, lots of attention and cuddles etc etc, but nothing works.

Sorry, this is not much help but just wanted to let you know you're not alone.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page