My ds is drving me insane!!

[bignose]

My ds(4) has suddenly become extremely demanding.He constantly needs my attention.He always has to tell me absolutely everything down to the fluff on a cuddly toy or the bubbles do this in the bath or look at the water.
He interupts me when Im talking all the time.He says "mummy" and then actually has nothing to say when I reply with a yes.
He is always just randomly saying he loves us-this inc my mum,his daddy&myself.This sounds nice but Im not sure why he is saying it such alot.
He has a sis of 13mths and she has become quite demanding lately.Im thinking that my ds is being like this becuse of my dd.
The thing that is worrying me is that he starts school in sept and Im not sure if Im handling it correctly.Am I making it worse.Im finding it hard to give him the constant attention that he wants.
He has to be in the same room as me most of the time.He lacks independence.He loves playschool and goes with no probs and is very comfortble there.
Maybe Im being unreasonable,maybe this is norm.Im so worried about him.
Me and my dh have always been very cuddly and loving with him.We always praise and now feel maybe we have over praised him and he is now so reliant on it that he needs it all the time.Its getting harder and harder to keep it up and should he need it so much now he's 4.
Oh please can someone advice....

ooooohhh my goodness! this is exactly the same as my ds 1 who will be 4 in june.....great at preschool, seems really popular, really active, happy etc etc... thing is he was so independant up to about 6 mths ago and now he cant bear to be left alone, follows me every where around the house.needs constant validation and attention..look at me..erm yes? i'm kneeling!!!...umm? great
doing lots of cutsie poo 'i love you mummy' with head cocked to side...very nice it is too but maybe 2 to 3 times an hour every hour. we have moved his 14 month baby brother into his room because he doesn't want to be alone. he didn't react badly to babys arrival and he seems happy enough in other ways.

i find it frustrating at times but its a phase and its draining but come school in september hes going to be away from home all day and i'm dreading that so i have to remind myself to appreciate it!!

but it would be good to hear that other people have had a similar situation

thank goodness,someone els.I just want to know how to handle.dont want to say wrong things but hes getting on my nerves bless him.

i make sure that he has really focused time with me at least once a day...it can be a tight squeeze..when baby has a nap and after baby has gone to bed he has one to one time. it is difficult doing things with his baby brother rampaging all over his puzzles/train track/trying to eat his lego/plasticine...but they do have good fun playing together....i think a big factor is all the encouragement baby gets trying to talk/walk/feed self..it is all a big hooray and my ds does a bit of regressing..feed me /i'm stuck on the stairs/under a chair/play peepo with meeeee!....thankfully thats the only regressive bits. i imagine its pretty tough being the first child and then having to share mummy and daddy

I agree.It must be hard.I cant stand the thought of him hurting.

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Hi

I have just come on to ask similar q. DS 3yr 9m who was never any real trouble at 2 has recently start whingeing/ stropping at the drop of a hat if DH or I say no. He is an only child so can't blame new sibling and we work very hard at not spoiling him so its not like he has ever got anything because he's stropped. He started pre-school in Jan whihc he loves and is popular and sociable. I wondered if it was just a stage of wanting to grow up but still wanting to be "our baby"

It definitely is a stage.My ds and my friends dc have dine this and some still do.He is testing his boundaries.

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My DS will be 4 next month and he is wanting my constant attention. He has a 19 month old sister who is getting alot of attention at the moment as she is starting to talk. If i talk to anyone or am on the phone he is constantly calling "mummny" and when i acknowledge him he has nothing to say, he is always coming up to me for cuddles and saying "i love you" (which is lovely) but he has never been a cuddly child unlike his sister. If i ask him to do anything he cant do it. Getting changed in the morning is an ordeal, he crys and whinges. He goes to nursery and is fine, doesn't whinge and gets changed no problem so i know he can do it.
He has started saying that he doesn't want me to go to work and stay with him.
My friends little girl is the same so i assume its a phase they go through.
When his sister has her daytime nap i make sure that i give him my full attention and we play games and have a great time.
I totally agree with what Oxford said about it being frustrating but come September he will be at school all day and i will miss it. So much so that i have decided to give up work next month so i can spend the summer with him before he starts school and keep his sister at nursery for 2 days a week so we get time on our own as that has not happened much since the birth of his sister.
When i saw this post i was so glad that i am not the only one experiencing this phase.

I feel a little better now.I think Im worrying too much.I kept thinkin I was making him worse.My friend said maybe I should say in a kind way that we will only say we love each other at bedtimes so its more special.

Hi there.Does no one else really have no advice for this?

No advice really but read it all with interest. My DD1 is acting in the same way. She will be 4 next week, we also have a DD2 who will be 2 the day after and DC3 will be born very soon after that. Also she is just starting 'taster-sessions at 'big school' which she will attend part time from Sept.

I was thinking all this strange behaviour was to do with all that but now I wonder if it is just a phase they have to go through.

She has also started having tantrums - sha has never really had them before - and the DDs actually draw blood over who can sit closest to mummy. It's all very suffocating but at the same sime rather worrying isn't it? Hope it doesn't last long!

It must be normal then.Im glad.Thought my ds had real emotional issues!
Was contemplating getting him seen by a child pyschologist!!!

Iv just spoken to my HV and she said that its a difficult time for this age as things are changing for them.They need the attentiona and we really must listen to them as much as poss.

This sounds just like my DS1 (was 4 in Jan) who also starts school in Sept. He is incapable of entertaining himself and has regular melt downs and is very angry a lot of the time. At parties he will not leave my side even though he knows all the children. I get a lot of 'What shall I do now'.
I spoke to his pre school teacher and the boy she described is totally different! Gregarious and outgoing!! Maybe he uses all that up in public and then needs more help at home!. I have just 'gone with the flow' and things have improved a bit over the last few weeks. We do have some time alone when DS2 and DD are in bed at lunchtime which he enjoys. Don't boys also get a testosterone surge about this time? All my friends DSs of this age are very emotional too and have tantrums and meltdowns over nothing as well. I jokingly say to DH (when DS1 isn't there!) that he has permanent PMT!

Lol.
Its so good to hear all this.