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Toddler only says daddy and is excited to see him, but not me

3 replies

teaandkittehs · 14/09/2024 13:10

Just what the title says really. She's 22 months nearly, and we share the parenting equally so there has been no primary carer for months, although my job is about to get busy again so I'll be out of the house a lot more very soon and i am so worried I'll just lose her completely. She's so excited to see daddy and says it as soon as she sees him, but she has nearly stopped saying mummy and never says it to me or when i come home etc. She's also very recently started crying and rolling around and fussing a lot when i put her to bed, too, whereas she goes straight to sleep for her dad. She never actually rejects me, yet, she just seems to really prefer him and it is making me feels incredibly sad. I don't blame either of them. He is a more fun and relaxed parent than me so perhaps I've contributed to this happening. I know a lot of them have a daddy phase but it seems to usually happen when the mum is the primary carer, and my job gets quiet in April so we've parented equally since then, although my partner will be the primary carer from late September to early April as I am the main breadwinner who works and earns a lot more. Just looking for someone to tell me it's normal and will pass, I'm so down about it, and sleep deprivation from a recent and very long sleep regression has really not helped my mental state through this.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Row23 · 14/09/2024 13:49

I don’t really have any advice, but can offer solidarity. My 18 month old has never said mummy, but will shout and say daddy constantly. Ask me where daddy is, asks daddy to play / read. It’s like I don’t exist sometimes!
So I do get how down it can make you feel 🧡

teaandkittehs · 14/09/2024 19:39

Row23 · 14/09/2024 13:49

I don’t really have any advice, but can offer solidarity. My 18 month old has never said mummy, but will shout and say daddy constantly. Ask me where daddy is, asks daddy to play / read. It’s like I don’t exist sometimes!
So I do get how down it can make you feel 🧡

I really appreciate your response, just to know I'm not the only one!

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teaandkittehs · 15/09/2024 20:16

Hopeful bump. . . Had a hideous day today at my husbands family's party where she just said and followed daddy all day. I'm so embarrassed and ashamed about this as they all saw how much she actively prefers him. She checked in with him every 3 minutes even when it was my turn to watch her and clearly just wanted to be with him. I don't understand why this is happening and I hate the fact that I just have to pretend everything is normal even though I'm screaming inside and so heartbroken about this.

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