I have 4 yo twin boys and they both seem to have developed a phobia of dogs, with one worse than the other. If one comes near him he gets extremely distressed, cries, asks to be picked up or taken home.
The puzzling thing is, we have our own dog and he’s never experienced any serious incidents such as being bitten or bowled over. Our own dog is a lurcher and very calm (except for occasional zoomies), doesn’t bark, sleeps most of the day (she’s an older dog) and I suppose is more like a cat in temperament. They don’t mind being around her but also don’t ever go up to her to stroke her or try to play with her (which has suited me just fine, as this is preferable to tail pulling etc). Likewise, she pretty much ignores them unless she suspects they’re about to drop some food. If she walks near them the more scared twin doesn’t get upset but he does get out of her way.
I just don’t know what to do when we encounter other dogs. Unfortunately other dog owners seem to be happy to just allow their “friendly” dogs to come bounding over to my kids and are slow to intervene or are just really dismissive of the fact that my kid is really terrified. Every incident of dogs bounding over to him and trying to lick his face etc is just making his phobia worse for him. He is only on the 2nd percentile so many dogs such as labradors are bigger than him or at face level. Sometimes my instinct is to pick him up if I see a dog approaching but I worry this is reinforcing the fear (and also struggle to pick them both up together now and the other twin is also a bit scared).
I am trying to gently encourage more calm interactions with our dog at home but I don’t think he really sees her as a dog. I don’t know many (any?) people with calm smaller dogs to practice interactions with. The only other dog they seem “ok” with is my sister’s dog (also a lurcher) so they have spent time with him too.
I’d really appreciate any advice, thank you!