21 months and not talking

[kay1981]

My DS is 21 months and just babbles, mamama, dadadad, vavavavava, dedededede, not actually saying anything, although he was early in the physical stages, sitting, crawling, walking, just not talking.

He hears perfectly and understands -absolutely- everything you say (whether you want him to or not!) and points to stuff he wants, but wont say it, or to be more precise, he grunts.

He will, for example, give me his juice cup, grab hold of my jumper, haul me into the kitchen, open the cupboard, take out his juice and just grunts at me. Ive tried not giving it to him unless he says "juice", but he just either cries or walks away indifferently!

My HV says id he not said anything by 2 then go back, the babbling has just started so does that mean his speech is coming along? Should i do something now or shall i just enjoy the peace while it lasts? BTW, I didnt speak until i was 2.5

xx

Thats great guys, thanks very much.
It is a very difficult thing because on one hand i think, well he knows everything i say and understands everything i say and is making sounds, so maybe he just absorbing everything and will talk when he's ready, but the worrier in me thinks, maybe its something deeper than that and id hate myself if there was something wrong and id not done anything about it!

I think i'll leave it for a while, i take on board all your suggestions and will definitely try them, but keep an eye on his progress until his birthday (august).

Just one thing though, he is a thinker and watches really intently, everything i do, and copies loads, so i know "the cogs are working" and he is now getting quite precise at doing things, like if he is (cant think of an example) but transfering something from one place to another, its all done quite precisely, so he is definitely a thinker. (again a daddy trait, not a mummy one thats for sure)

Thanks again

my nephew said almost nothing and made very little noise until he turned two when he started talking in virtually full sentences. He's now nearly 9 and you can't shut him up!

My ds was also later on the scale for talking. By 2 he had hardly any words ... his own word for digger and water and Mama, Dada, Nanny, nothing else. That didn't really change until he was 2.5 years old when he started nursery.
Like you I knew he understood everything, he would point to things, pull me to get stuff etc. He's always been v. busy "doing" things - walking, climbing, building, running etc and think all his efforts were going in that direction. DD talked earlier and wasn't so advanced
Remember there is a big range of "normal" at this age. Even at 2, I wouldn't worry too much.

The fact that he points is a good sign. Does he follow instructions like 'get your shoes'? If he can point at juice, I would discourage him from dragging you. Make him understand that the pointing is enough and say 'yes juice'

As long as he understands you then there is obviously no probs with his hearing and I wouldn't worry - he will all of a sudden surprise you.

My DS1 is 17 months and babbles mama, dada etc but says very little else apart from quack quack when he sees a duck and daisy when he sees upsy daisy!!! We are bringing him up bilingual and I just figure he is spending his time understanding language and will one day surprise me with a burst of Italian!!!!

As long as he understands you then there is obviously no probs with his hearing and I wouldn't worry - he will all of a sudden surprise you.

My DS1 is 17 months and babbles mama, dada etc but says very little else apart from quack quack when he sees a duck and daisy when he sees upsy daisy!!! We are bringing him up bilingual and I just figure he is spending his time understanding language and will one day surprise me with a burst of Italian!!!!

PS My speech was dreadful (couldn't say S's or F's - which with a name like Sophie was funny!) and my handwriting even worse. Mum and Dad were constantly being called into school about it. Mum just laughed about the handwriting and said that it is what I write and not how it looks that is important. I ended up getting a Masters degree at Oxford so she was obviously right to laugh!!!

good for you sophiebbb!!

cyberseraphim - he understands perfectly "get your shoes". When my DH comes home from work, my DS run straight to the coat cupboard, then tries to take off DH's shoes and opens the shoe cupboard door and only then will he have a cudddle with daddy!

You can ask him anything and he understands, even "wheres your/mummy nose?" and he presses his/my nose, but if i point to my nose and say "whats this", he makes a sneezing noise and laughs, same as if i point to my mouth, he makes a coughing noise (I was beginning to think i am permantently suffering from a cold!)

So he is picking up on things, but not saying words. Grr. I do laugh though and think when he does talk, i'll be on here saying - how can i shut my child up!

xx

My ds was exactly the same. He's 2.7 now but has only been talking properly for the last 4 or 5 months. Before that he really didn't say more than a few words (ie. mummy, daddy, nanna etc) Everyone told me "it'll happen overnight and he won't shut up" and boy were they right! I spoke to a friend of my mums who is an inspector of nurserys in our borough about it when he was about 18 months old and her advice was to wait until he was 2.6, and if he still wasn't speaking ask GP to refer to a speech therapist. She also said though that the first thing the therapist will look for is whether the child understands what is being said to them (which you have said your dc does as did mine) and this did go some way to put my mind at rest. I wasn't overly worried but of course it does play on your mind!

Understanding and following instructions and communicating in other ways is all that you need to look for at this age. It's the communication that matters not the speech when so young

I related to fizzbuzz when I read this thread - my son did not speak till gone 2 but also clearly understood instructions - did not stop mil who was a teacher telling me he was educationally sub normal.
He's mid teens now and recently won his house debating competition at school. He has had lead parts in a number of dramatic productions & has been told he could act professionally. Mil has never recanted however!
Babbling is important - the only friend I have had whose child did turn out to have a speech problem had commented more than once that child did not "babble". If your child has a lot of colds they may be getting ear infections meaning hearing problems with knock on effect on speech.
All the best.

Does he point to things that interest him (rather than things he wants)

Babytalk by Sally Ward is a great book.

ds is the same - he's 21.5 months and has a range of words, and can repeat but not retain very much. however, he understands pretty much everything you say, even the first time - it just seems the verbalising isn't quite there yet.

he walked at 15.5 months, and didn't do the usual pulling himself up, couple of wobbly steps etc, just went from standing unaided for about 20 seconds to full blown walking in a few days, and then a week later pretty much running!

am hoping that speech is going to be the same and he's going to start it all in one go, although he does chat away to himself all the time!

My DS was like this and the HV referred him for hearing test and speech therapy. Needless to say hearing was fine and speech therapist was not worried. We started using makaton with him (like on something special) getting him to sign and say and his speech is now coming on in leaps and bounds.

All children develop at their own pace saome are late walkers others are late talkers, they all catch up with each other in the end.

Mine was like this at that age. At 2 the floodgates opened and he hasn't stopped since.

I go to baby-signing classes with DD - find them really interesting and definately helping us both become more aware of language - might be worth looking into as others have mentioned. Also a good way to meet other Mums, some of which have children with hearing problems, who have really good ideas on developing communication.

My ds 1 didn'd say anything till 2. Words came then and within weeks full sentences with very developed vocab. He took it all in whilst sitting there watching us all!

We did a few BSL signs with him and this helped us until he was ready.

I would definitely keep an eye on things. The fact that he is actually babbling is a good sign - this is so important - my DD didn't babble or speak, but she clearly understood everything I told her which was a block when it came to getting the professionals to take on board that things were not right. The professionals refused to do anything until at 3 I had her assessed by a private speech therapist who diagnosed severe verbal dyspraxia - she was then immediatley put in a pre-school language unit & needed intensive speech therapy just to help her to talk. We used sign language until she could talk. In fact providing her with an alternative means of communication was an essential part of the therapy as it took the pressure off her to talk. There are still severe problems with language & communication & auditory processing as well as a huge impact on literacy (she is now nearly 10). I'm sure that your DS won't have these problems, but I would suggest that you definitely keep an eye on things - more & more children are entering school with delayed language.

DD1 didn't have any words at all until she was nearly two. In fact she wouldn't even open her mouth - just grunted with her lips tightly pressed together. Then suddenly she started and you couldn't stop her. She's four now and rarely takes a breath .

My son was exactly the sama kay1981. I actually took him to see a speech therapist at around 19 months (paranoid 1st time mother) and she said that there was a delay in his speech but that it was nothing to worry about as he clearly understood what was being said to him. He is now 3.4 and talks extremely well (and doesn't generally stop)and is ahead of most of his peers in terms of vocabulary and sentence structure. IMO I think he was taking it all in and didn't want to talk until he could get it right. He didn't walk until he was 14 months. So I wouldn't worry too much but just keep an eye on it.

I seem to remember from my child psychology classes (a good 20 years ago now, shockingly - maybe its all changed?) - that the ONLY evidenced gender difference between the development of boys and girls was that boys tended to be faster in spatial awareness things and girls in language.

Interestingly, this did not necessarily mean that it was a genetic difference as they found that when any baby was dressed in pink that people spoke more to it and tended to be more physical with babies dressed in blue..

I don't think I am suggesting that you should dress your ds in pink, but well... you never know!!!

Good luck!

Hi,
i would definitely have your LO checked out by 2. My son understood what was going on - pointing to things, knew from visual cues when we were going out etc, lots of babbling, could hear the planes overhead for instance. So I thought his hearing was fine. Turns out he has glue ear where sounds are muffled and so this has hindered his speech development because he can't hear the full range of sounds. He's now doing speech therapy, including sign language which has helped to reduce the frustration he was having - still only about 20-30 words. He may need to have an operation to have grommits put in to unblock his ears but no rush on this as it does involve a general anasthetic. So please don't wait - have the hearing test, get your LO on the list for speech therapy. Good luck!

Hello mumsnetters, I am now worried my dd is nearly 2 1/2 and sounds like she is talking in a foreign language! She understands most of what I say but has a very limited vocab. She is also getting increasingly frustrated when I don't understand what she is trying to say!