I have a head strong 3yo Dd. She has had a handful of massive meltdowns over the last couple of months (all because things haven't planned out how she imagined - sort of like not getting her own way)- I think her tantrums fall within the realms of normal for her age and development so not overly concerned. What I don't like is, once she's snapped out of an episode she'll tell me she's going to be a "good girl" and "not cry or be sad again". I've tried to tell her that she can cry, she can be sad - it's the behaviour we don't want - the hitting, pulling, pushing, throwing herself on the floor etc. Is it possible to teach her at such a young age to know the difference? I try to keep language neutral during a meltdown but will ask her to calm down, to relax. I've probably said stuff like "you can't be like this here" or something like that (meltdown outside by main road) - avoided saying she's bad or naughty.