My 27 month old son is my world, he has always been one of the last of the babies I know in his age group to develop something - but he is usually gets there.
He has some things that make me wonder should be pushing to get looked at, but he is my first and donât know if they are fairly normal things for a toddler/boy to do? I love my son either way, and Iâm not worried - Iâd guess from his development if he isnât far down any spectrum, but I donât want to miss cues when I should be getting him some support if he needs it so he can achieve what ever he wants in life (what ever that may be!) I feel a bit fobbed off when I do mention it.
Potential things my son does:
- Lines up toys - I donât think he is obsessive about this, he loves vehicles and will push them around turning corners and up and down sides and down slides, but also likes to line them up a lot (then will drive them off from the line)
- Doesnât engage with much imaginary play - he will pretend to sip from a play cup and sometimes pretend to talk on a phone, but thatâs it. He isnât interested in dolls or his play kitchen unless itâs putting stuff in the sink cupboard (more sorting than imaginative play)
- struggles with empathy - seems unbothered if he sees a care giver crying - will just carry on playing. Though if he sees a character in a book with a sad face heâll say âmouse is sadâ, will smile back if we smile at him, seems to like it when he makes someone laugh. Also on occasion if someone has got hurt (usually by him when he used to throw toys) and cry, heâd run to the other parent to get them to come help.
- Not great with interacting with other children. He will sometimes - if they run around he will run with them and look at them to see if they are chasing him and smile and will play alongside other kids - but wonât engage them or try talk to them. If they pass a toy to him he will take it but wouldnât pass a toy back. Can be very boisterous (pushes other kids at times. Hugs and brings them both to the ground. Kicks - doesnât really do this in nursery but they have said he likes rough play and struggles to understand he can do this with older kids but not younger). He mentions his nursery friends at home.
- sometimes bangs his head - but not too strongly and not repetitively - prob like once a month (if that! he will do it on something
*occasionally hand flaps if very excited, again Iâve prob seen him do this once or twice a month if sitting down and really excited, will only last like 10 seconds
- will sometimes completely ignore me. He will respond to his name and can follow instructions (put the toy back in the box, put the book back in the book case, come here, donât touch that etc etc) but sometimes will completely ignore me - for example Iâll ask him to say bye to someone 50% of the time he does and 50% he will just completely ignore me like I havenât said anything (I think this is just because he doesnât want to do it?)
*he is shy around strangers, if they talk to him he will freeze and look at the ground. Takes a couple of hours to warm up to people and interact with them.
*potential sensory issues - doesnât like his hair being brushed, teeth being brushed, putting on clothes, changing nappies - will scream. But not bothered by noises, textures, smells etc
However, he walked and crawled at normal times, he has hit all his talking milestones (he doesnât put loads of words together but can do some two and three word sentences âwhatâs that noise?â âWhere Mabel goneâ âgoing in daddyâs carâ but will often communicate with one word e.g. âsnackâ instead of saying I want snack. He knows over 100 words, will point at the correct things if I say âwhere is _â will name the right things if I point to it and ask what it is, points out things to us when out and about, brings us stuff as shared interest, will check we are around when playing, lets us know what he needs (drink, mummy go playroom, mummy come back, snack) Whilst he is shy he is interested in other people and kids and will look at what they are doing from a safe distance, brings us books to read and will do the interactive things as part of the book, likes playing with us, laughs lots, plays with toys, isnât rigid with routine, has a lot of eye contact but maybe doesnât hold it for long periods of time, will mimick things - I do baby yoga poses with him and he copies me. Knows his body parts and will point them out on him and me.
sorry for so much information - it just seems like he isnât a-typical with normal development but also isnât a-typical with ASD - potentially ADHD as he has a lot of energy and is very loud, if he is unhappy with anything he will let you know very loudly đđ Who knows. I know no one can tell me, but just wondering if any other toddlers out there are similar or anyone else had a similar experience and what that ended up being to know if I need to push to get some support? Thanks for any shared experiences/words of wisdom x