Couple of people saying ds will not settle in a creche when go back to work. Makes me want to cry

[Again]

I'll be going to work in a month and thinking of putting ds in a creche 3 mornings a week, while both dh and I work part time so that he won't need to be in childcare for too long.

We recently moved to a new country and he can sometimes be quite clingy to me. One person, who he will not settle with keeps saying that she doesn't know how any creche will handle him.

Generally though he is very easy going and it's only a relatively recent thing. Some people he just connects with straight away.

I believe that it's important that he forms a strong bond with me and his dad, but it's hard to keep this up when other people just see a clingy baby.

He's 9 months. Is this normal or am I too attached?

Don't worry, all normal! Most little ones will cry and make a fuss when you first start to leave them, but as soon as you're out of earshot they are usually fine.

He will be fine, it's because he is at the stage where he gets 'separation anxiety'.

He will be with professionals who know lots of strategies to settle a baby into childcare.

Don't let anyone out you off.

Good luck

At this age he is going through a normal developmental phase called "separation anxiety" Again. That "one person" wouldn't be your MIL by any chance?
Apart from Separation Anxiety, by nine months most babies will be evolving pretty firm views on whose company they like best. Familiarity and the overwhelming love they have for their mum and dad apart, they will always have other preferences - for not being held too tight, frowned at, bounced too energetically, or spoken to very loudly.
You might have a few hiccups getting him settled in a creche because of his age but it will be nothing to do with him being "difficult".

It will be tough the first 1-2 days, but then you will be amazed at how he will want to go there.

DD was terribly attached to me and would stay stuck on me even at home. I put her in a part-time creche (several hours per week) just build up her independence and get her to play with other kids a bit.

First day she cried and I cried. Came back two hours later, still with tears in my eyes and found her happily playing with other kids . Second time she whimpered a bit as I left her there and I ran out before I saw her cry but heard her wail behind me . She was again a happy bunny when I came back.

Third day she was running to see her friends at the creche and banged at the door so they would let her in quickly.

All this to tell you not to worry

Mine loved it. Cried when I came to collect him ....

what the others said. Also a good creche should offer a "settling in" period, where you'll be there with him while he gets used to a new environment and his key worker. This should make things a bit easier for him

We'll be going to see one tomorrow so I think I'll talk to them about my concerns and try to tell myself it's normal!

Again: "One person, who he will not settle with keeps saying that she doesn't know how any creche will handle him."

I question the professionalism of a carer who would make such sweeping pronouncements on a 9 month old, who is acting in every way what you would expect a 9 month old to do.

Forget her, she is just covering her tracks when she really isn't that good or only wanting to care for easy babies. I would expect my dcs' carers to have a more positive attitude and reassure me, rather than worry me. And feedback honestly how the day went.

It is possible to settle a baby with separation anxiety. Give it a longer settling in period when you stay with baby and observe the creche. I settled 2 clingy bf-ed dcs, including ds at 8 months - they got so much out of being at nursery. With patience it is possible. And if it is not working out, you can reconsider at that point.

All the best with the visit.

do some settling in sessions for him. he will meet new wee pals and enjoy himself. naturally this will take you both a bit of getting used to (but chances are you will worry more than him) i know i did

take familiar blanket for nap time
talk to him now about nursery

dont take flak about a perfectly reasonable decision.

frankly you will always encounter the eye rolling harrumpher who disagrees about nursery and (thinks they) know your child better than you. well just let them get on with it

good luck