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13 Month Old, Very Stroppy, Any Suggestions Please?

6 replies

AdeleFielder · 06/04/2008 14:57

Firstly, i think it's quite unusual to be stropping like this at this age, so struggling to get advice. My daughter has been very difficult for the last 3 weeks. When i say stroppy i mean, she lies on the floor, lifting her bum up and down, with knees bent, (therefore moving around where ever she is) and crying/winging.

There seem to be various triggers, normally when she cant get what she wants, what ever that might be. It might be me putting her down or telling her she can't have or do something.

I have tried ignoring it, and it wasn't getting any better and she goes on for such along time, every time. So i tried telling her to be quiet, shh and tapping her hand if she continued...And that didn't work. (my husbands idea, i'm not in favour) And now i'm back to ignoring it and not getting anywhere still.

I know it's a difficult age, as they want to be independant and i try to encourage that when possible, i'm very good at talking to her. I have also tried to ditract her and divert her, but that doesn't work, only seems to fuel it. I'm not sure if separation anxiety is part of it, and realise that you treat that differently, but my approaches to that don't work either.

I was considering, putting travel cot up in office down stairs and when she goes off on one, just to put her in it till she calms down. As then she cant get about and maybe knock into things when she's having a wobbler. and wouldn't be getting any attention. But i just don't know...

If any one has any thoughs, please let me know. I'm going to speak to health visitor tomorrow as well. thanx adele

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1973magpie · 06/04/2008 15:22

Hi, I'm afraid I don't have anything useful to suggest, but massive sympathies .

My dd is 13 months too, and she has started screaming (a really high pitched screech, that goes right through you) whenever she wants something, feels thwarted or my dh or I say no to anything, sometimes there doesn't seem to be a reason for it at all!

It is really getting us down, in all other respects she is a lovely child, but this noise!!

We too have tried ignoring her when she does it, saying no, distracting her etc, but nothing seems to work .

For now, we have decided to completely ignore her (not easy) while she screams and pay her lots of attention when she stops or isn't screaming, and it does seem to be having a slight effect, so we'll see...

Good luck with your lo - at least you know you're not alone

AdeleFielder · 06/04/2008 15:26

thank you,

OP posts:
1973magpie · 06/04/2008 15:28

DD has also decided that she hates her pushchair, and screeches for most of the time that she is in it, which is irritating and somewhat embarassing when we are out and about - especially as I am a childminder!.

I am getting a new pushchair next week so fingers crossed that will help...

If you, or anyone else, has any suggestions as to why this might be I would be eternally grateful

Poohbah · 06/04/2008 16:35

Why don't you just pick her up, hold her closely until she calms down and then say "We don't have tantrums in this family" and when she is calm then distract her.

I would baby proof the house, remove anything that is dangerous or make an area very safe so that there is less room for these triggers.

If she is not too heavy I would try popping her on your back in a Ergo Sling that way she is with you but you are hands free.

Maybe get some new more stimulating toys...if you think she might be a bit frustrated and bored I think it's normal behaviour.

mrsgboring · 06/04/2008 18:41

Sing with great gusto one of her favourite songs as soon as she looks like starting. It at least gives you something to do while she's shouting, but it's all normal and won't last toooooo long

evenhope · 06/04/2008 18:51

My DD1 did this at 10 months old

None of my DSs did it at all.

My DD2 has started doing it at 12 mo. It is a tantrum. Ignoring is best, and easier if she can't hurt herself in the process.

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