Feel like giving up - 2 year old hitting.

[Neurospicymum]

My 2 year old son hits me constantly. Without provocation. Just BAM out of nowhere. For example, we have only been up for 3 hours and he's already slapped me across the face several times (HARD), kicked me in the mouth, pulled hair out of my head.

Other examples of what he does; punches me in the head/face, claws my face and arms (causing cuts and blood) even though I cut his nails regularly, head butts, throws toys/uses toys to hit me.

He never does this to anyone else. Not his dad, my parents, his friends, nursery staff etc. It's just me. He doesn't do it when he's upset or frustrated he could be playing happily and then all of a sudden he just hits me hard out of nowhere and it's definitely on purpose with the intent to hurt.

I understand that he is 2 and he's learning about boundaries and I've tried to be understanding and redirect the behaviour and use distraction etc. I've tried removing him from me, removing myself from him. I've tried the naughty step (doesn't work as he's only 2 and I don't really like it), I've tried taking the toys he hits me with away, I've tried calmly telling him to use gentle hands and showing him to stroke my face instead, I've tried shouting (I don't like doing this, it's ineffective and makes me more wound up and he just laughs anyway) - what am I supposed to do?

My son is actually a lovely boy, I know I haven't made him sound like it but he is, just not to me. It's really affecting my relationship with him and I've actually started to coware every time he come near me because I just expect to be hurt. I feel really stupid writing this, like I'm a victim of abuse from a 2 year old but at this point it kinda feels like I am. I just feel like giving up, I actually cry from the pain sometimes and it's just constant. I work Sunday to Tuesday and I dread the rest of the week having to be with him.

I totally get that at this age all the hitting is part of his development but surely it's not supposed to be this bad?

P.s. please be gentle with me, it's my first post and he's my first child and I just need help.

I’m no expert as my two year old has her moments too, but I think it’s quite normal. Mine was pushing another one over and I would shout at her, but when I spoke calmly and explained it’s not nice as it hurts others and makes them feel sad, then she seemed to stop doing it. Also if she knows I care too much about something she uses it for attention, so sometimes you need to act like it doesn’t bother you that much even if it does. Toddlers are always naughtier for their parents. Staying calm is the best approach. Stop his hands hitting you by holding them and calmly say “we don’t hit other people because it hurts them. If you do it again mummy will leave”. Then if he does it again calmly get up and leave the room. If he follows you that’s fine, he’ll probably be a bit upset you left. Let him come to you again and carry on with your game or whatever you were doing. Just repeat this process for consistency.