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My partners son won't go to school.

5 replies

beccaxlou · 29/04/2024 13:38

Hello guys,
Just looking for some guidance, I met my new partner about 6 months ago, he has 3 children (12,11 and 9) I have 2 children (16 and 9) Now he is not usually my type but we've both been through alot through our lives and essentially bonded off that and have been strong for each other when we have needed it, hes had it alot harder than me and moved up through refuge after leaving an abusive relationship and he has full custody of the children. The eldest son (almost 13) has been refusing to go to school for almost a year now, I've supported him through court, school meetings, he has the welfare officer involved and it will escalate I assume. He originally stopped going last year because he was jumped by some other boys and ever since has refused to almost leave the house since then. My partner has l3t him get away with it for so long it's now got to the point where his son doesn't care what happenes nor the consequences, he swears at his dad and is very disrespectful and rude jn my opinion, my 2 sons are very grounded and well behaved and I have shielded them from the relationship breakdown I had with their dad and we are all on good terms. My issue is that I don't want my new partners son to influence my children but I also want to offer my help and support but don't know what more I can say as it's not my place to interfere. The other 2 of his children go to school with no issues at all. Any advice about where to turn would be grateful. Thankyou

OP posts:
CadyEastman · 29/04/2024 16:24

What help is he getting currently?

beccaxlou · 29/04/2024 18:36

Currently next to none, the school won't work with him unless he's on school property, the welfare officer advised to get a pcso to talk to him but he's had it before apparently and didn't listen. He's spoken to young minds and just said he has anxiety and refuses to go anywhere and do anything. His mother just blames his dad. His dad's beeb to court once and already had a fine. I got him into school for a meeting but all he did was sit with his head in his lap and then barge out the door when the teacher was telling him some rules to abide by. Its so difficult because he needs some hard parenting but I csnt overstep because it's a very new relationship and I'm focusing on my children aswell.

OP posts:
CadyEastman · 29/04/2024 19:17

Is he being seen by CAHMS or receiving any counselling through the school? Has his DF applied for an ECHP?

beccaxlou · 29/04/2024 19:58

The school said he didn't qualify? I said I would be questioning that but it was before we were together. He had some councilling when they first moved up here but after a few sessions of which apparently he didn't really say much he then refused to go again. I just don't know what advice to give him in order to help.

OP posts:
CadyEastman · 29/04/2024 20:07

My DD can't engage in counselling and dud school refuse. She's now being assessed for ASD & ADHD. Has your DO ever talked to his GP about the possibility or about getting him some alternative therapy?

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