I am so angry - DS2 (5 1/2) has just cut a hole in his brand new Man U shirt that cost £30!

[josben]

I have sent him to his room - my mum brought it for him as his easter present and he has just gone and done that!!

DH and I have both had a very stern talk to him and he is upset about it, but DS2's lack of respect for his things has just made me feel gutted...

How long do I leave him in his bedroom and should I take away a toys / priviledges?

Where did he get the scissors/knife to cut it?

If I were you I would have left them out of his reach.

And look on the bright side... at least it wasn't a Liverpool top he cut!

One reason why scissors and knives are well hidden in our house.

DH very unhelpfully says "best thing that could happen to it, did he burn it as well?"

@ NJ's dh..... it was mine that quipped at least it wasn't a good Liverpool shirt that got cut!

Sympathy, josben...

Does he pick holes in the wallpaper as well? I've got one of those - he's nearly 15 and has more or less stopped deliberately damaging things, but is still careless (eg he has pet rats and leaves all sorts of things near enough for them to chew holes in through the bars).

(The worst wallpaper one was when we visited relations who had just decorated their hall with blown vinyl and he picked lots of little bits off it )

If it helps, I don't believe it's malicious, or an indication that they'll grow up to be vandals - they just don't realise what they're doing.

I was a wallpaper picker too

Woodchip was my favourite....

Ooh, you've just rekindled happy memories of picking at woodchip and blown vinyl. Mind you, the only time I wrote on the walls I used a pencil.

I can see why it is infuriating - all I can remember is that I wasn't being deliberately destructive, it was like scratching an itch.

Does he have a habit doing this sort of thing?
DS cut a hole in his newest pjs this week (the only ones that aren't a bit on the short side).

It is the first time so I am considering it an experiment. I have just explained why it is unacceptable but if it happens again the scissors will be going in a locked drawer and he will only be able to do cutting activities when I have the time to sit with him.

Was he being deliberately naughty?
Or inquisitive and inventive?

He wouldn't have known how valuable the top was in monetary terms.

If he'd cut up a £1.99 t-shirt from Asda, would you still have been so angry?

What I'm trying to say is that perhaps he was just playing, and things got a bit out of hand.

I think I would just have a chat about looking after things, and let him know what he can and can't use as craft materials!

And leave it at that.

At 5 and 1/2 he doesn't know what it costs!

What's wrong with that?

DS is just five and we tell him things are expensive or inexpensive to explain why we can't/do have certain things or can't have/do them very often. But I am not sure he would understand the difference between one article of clothing and another.

I should rephrase that.
He would understand if we explained, but he is not very brand aware so certainly would not think anything like 'oh, if I'm going to experiment cutting cloth, I should use one of those cheap pack of 3 T-shirts Mum bought rather than the expensive Monsoon top that Grandad gave me'.

Agree with othersideofthe, he has no idea how much things cost, he's only 5, it wouldn't have been with malicious intent, so he deserves a brief telling off and then forget about it imo. And hide the scissors.

Oh god, they always lose the expensive things too. DS2 had a few nice designer-type sweatshirts when he was little and lost the lot (some from Oxfam but still...)

And once he went to school in a brand new M&S shirt, age 13, and came home with an ancient Asda one, age 9-10

5yos don't have 'respect for things' imo

My 41/2 can be handy with the scissors. Personally I'd not let her wear a top for 30quid as she would have no dieaof the monenary value.

It isn't the first time he has been handy with scissors, he's recently hacked into his pyjamas too! (They're only childrens scissors, for cutting and sticking)

But I probably did over react a bit at the time, - he was possibly being 'inquisitive and inventive'. !

Hercules as you say, he probably shouldn't be wearing a 30 quid T shirt at 5, but my mum wanted to buy it for him as he's desperately wanted a footie shirt like the one his older brother has.

Oh well, he knows it was wrong and we have left it at that now

I wouldn't concentrate on the value of that particular item of clothing, I would emphasise that it's wrong to cut ANY clothes!

At 5.5 he should be able to grasp that.

But my usually very undestructibe DS, 6.5, has managed to make a huge hole in his Boden top with a guitar print on it.

There was a tiny hole, but it was suddenly huge. I asked how it had happened. "I did it, Mummy, it just looks so much more rock and roll now"

He will be able to grasp it, Blu, but not necessarily to remember it the next time the urge is upon him...

Why are you buying him stuff like this ???

It was his grandma, moondog - it's what they do.

Josben, probably quite good that it is a top he coveted, he will see that it doesn't look so good with a hole in it/patched up.

Not good news for me to hear it started with pyjama hacking.