22 month old not talking & understanding

[Boymama2705]

Hi,
My little one is 22 months & has no words yet. Babbles/chats away in gibberish all the time but no specific words. Or animal noises.
I am also unsure of his understanding, if I told him to go get the ball or get your cup he wouldn't know what I was on about.
He has no sensory issues, no repetitive issues, sleeps well, doesn't struggle with routine changes etc and has great eye contact/answers to his name (most of the time).
However I spoke to his nursery this morning and they advised he doesn't really engage with his peers and prefers to play on his own or be with staff. I've been in tears since I dropped him off. Can anyone offer any advice/ personal experience?
Thanks x

@Boymama2705 Can I ask how your son is doing now? We're in a similar situation

Hi @Needer8954,
So our little one turned 2 last week. We have seen some slight progress with words for example we have taken him to the snack cupboard a couple of times and asked what he wants, and he said cake😂 it also sounds like he is trying to say yuck, bubble, hiya and bye here and there. So some slight progress but still behind his peers a lot.
We feel his understanding has come on slightly also, he understands sit down, stand up, bathtime etc but I still can't ask him to go get his shoes and he would.
We have a referral in from the last HV visit to the Child Development Clinic, they advised to have it in anyway as the waiting list is so long and if we don't need it then we can cancel.
I totally understand your worry, I have been in such a bad place but seeing little bits of progress is amazing.
How is your little one getting on? X

@Boymama2705
Thanks for the reply, it's great to see your son making progress. My son is currently 19 months old. He doesn't point (he may have randomly pointed like 4 times on TV in the last month). But I feel like he doesn't understand us at all, the only thing he understands is the word "no" and "give" but when I use a two word command he doesn't know what to do for example get shoes. When he wants something he either brings it to us and when he can't reach it he starts whining and gesticulating with his hands in a put it down style. At the moment he has hardly any words except for daddy (dada) but he babbles almost all day. Otherwise he is very active and social with very good eye contact. He also knows some nursery rhymes, when I sing them to him he knows what to do with his hands (sometimes he does it on his own and sometimes he wants me to hold his hands and then he does it on his own). He can even imitate me and give his stuffed animal a drink. Last week we taught him to throw his diaper in the trash after changing and he always claps afterwards :D. But it's the understanding and pointing that bothers me, as when I say bath time he basically doesn't understand but when I turn on the shower he comes.

@Needer8954 awww bless him🥰He sounds a lot like our little guy! Bringing stuff to us or whining etc.
Our little guy doesn't point, well with his index finger anyway and I know this is big thing from what I read. He will with his whole hand but not properly. And he babbles constantly too, but I've noticed within the last couple of weeks since the random words here and there have started, that the babbling seems different (in a good way if that makes sense) 😂
But it's the understanding and communication that is our biggest worry too!

Does your little one go to nursery or anything? Do they have any concerns?

It's so hard not to worry, especially when there are all these milestones and they seem so far behind. It's only been within the last 2 weeks the words here and there have started and it was out of nowhere. And he sings ee-aye ee-aye after we sing old McDonald which he never done before! I just hope it doesn't stop! X

@Boymama2705
He doesn't go to the nursery, where I live it's complicated for kids this young and there aren't many options or they are overcrowded, but he likes kids as such, he plays chase with them and doesn't shy away from them. We went for an 18 month check up and the pediatrician had no concerns but then based on the M-CHAT (scored 3) questionnaire I started googling and got nervous and since he didn't pass the M-CHAT so next visit is at 2 years

@Needer8954 ahhhh ok! As I mentioned in a previous post our nursery said he doesn't mind playing with other kids but prefers to play alone, but it's not an issue as most kids (especially boys) can play independently at this age and it's no cause for concern 🥴
We had never had any worries about this until they mentioned that.
Our HV wasn't concerned either until the very last visit where he was unwell and basically just ignored her the full time.
I think when it's not staring them in the face it's so hard to tell. And they are still so young!

Google is the worst! You end up in a hole don't you?!
Well I would say just give the little man more time, we genuinely didn't notice much difference until just before he turned 2 there. There's still a long way to go and hopefully they just keep progressing 🥰

I will try and keep this thread updated as I always used to find ones with no updates as to how they were getting on! X

@Boymama2705 Minor update after a month. He finally started pointing 14 days ago, at first he only started pointing at home on the TV at his favorite songs and things in them like the tractor, car, kids etc. But outside only occasionally at the car, but a few days ago he started pointing outside at everything and almost all the time and every time he points he looks at me. I'd say he's even started to understand a bit more, but progress is still small (for example I said outside "where are we going now" and he pointed to the door and looked at me). He's exactly 20 months old today and I'm hoping it will get better with time. Any progress with your toddler?

@Boymama2705 Hello, some update about your little one?

@Needer8954
Hi, sorry I haven't updated in a while, it's been a stressful couple of months.
So initially after the great few weeks before his 2nd birthday where words seemed to be appearing, they have now stopped again. I honestly thought that was it starting but I guess not.
Still babbling constantly in his own wee language but still no words, he is 2 years 2 months now.
No index finger pointing & doesn't really wave bye. Still a social little thing, and feel he still understands some things.
But his tantrums have got quite bad, seems to be from frustration. Has started throwing his head back and has hit his head on the floor a couple of times (not super hard) but that has been really upsetting.
We also noticed on holiday he was doing a strange thing with his food on the high chair, moving it from one side to the other but that's stopped.
Still sleeps well/eats well etc.
I've been in a horrible place, the worry and anxiety has been terrible.
How is your little one? X

Have you been referred @Boymama2705 ? I would push now for a referral to a developmental paediatrician and asks refer to SALT. If HV is not supportive, make a list and go via GP. We had to do that as well as HV never was concerned despite all these red flags.

Get a hearing test booked to rule out any underlying hearing issues. they like to have that box ticked. HV or GP can refer to audiology.

And sorry you are having such a hard time. The age around 2 when it's very much the not knowing was awful for us.

@Boymama2705
I'm sorry, I can imagine how stressful it is even though we are making some progress so I'm still stressed about what's to come. For us, the big milestone has been about a month since he started pointing properly (he points outside all the time, but only occasionally when he wants something as he can usually get it on his own). He still doesn't talk but you can see he tries to repeat words or signs sometimes. He has learned a few animal sounds and I can ask him for example "what sound does a pig make" and he will make a pig (or snake etc) but he must be really in the mood. He has even started to show body parts on request (belly button, nose). But in the last 2 weeks he has really started to understand more, I can ask him to go get his shoes and run to the next room and get his shoes or I can give him something and tell him to throw it in the bin and he run to the kitchen and throw it away (not always of course, sometimes he starts whining that he probably doesn't want to do that) so now I'm mostly worried about his speech.

@doppelganger2 we are on the audiology and child development clinic waiting lists but have been told they are up to 2 years waiting times.

@Needer8954 sounds like your little one is coming on great and everything is moving in the right direction xx

@Boymama2705 what about Salt? 2 years is awful. he will start school before he gets seem at that rate. What does nursery say?

@doppelganger2 we had a video call back at the end of May with salt, just giving us some tips etc and to do that for 3 months. They advised at the time he wouldn't benefit from 1-1 sessions, I think he was too young? X

i think you need a proper assessments as to where he is and what his strengths and weaknesses are. I would insist on that. When they are so young, it is much better to do embedded work at home but I would want a detailed assessment to know where he is.

@Boymama2705 sorry to hear you are worried - you have mentioned before that your LO is at nursery, do they have a SEN lead? Ours did and they did some one on one time with our son when we were worried.

@Boymama2705 Hello is there some update? :)

@Needer8954 hey, not much of an update really. Little one will repeat some words while watching yaka dee etc but won't use any in context really. Speech therapist thinks he is a Gestalt Language Processer so had an online session regarding that. We also have play sessions booked with our local education department to help him with his social development (as he stands back from groups of children at nursery and doesn't join in) so they start next week. How's your little one? X

@Boymama2705 So, thats good sign when he is repeating words :). What about understanding?. Mine is almost 2y (in 10 days). Still not talking but added some words like "ba" for ball, bye bye (and waving), and can do lots of animal sounds when prompted or see the animal (horse, monkey, pig, cow, snake, bird etc) so he is about 25 words total I guess (If I count all). But mostly he just point the item he wants and saying something like "want" or sometimes "that". His understanding is better now but not perfect. Can ask him for bring your pyjama, or bring the ball, diaper etc. (but again depend on the mood, he just sometimes whine he dont want to do it). He also learned some signs for up, down, please. But if I want to make him repeating words after me he just grunt. But If I start signing his favourite nursery rhymes (head, shoulder, knees) he will dance on it and he repeat every moves from his favourite kids shows (ofc is limited).

@Needer8954 your little boy sounds quite similar to what mine was like coming up to two years, maybe actually slightly more advanced. I think I spent the first 2 and a bit years of his life worrying about his development - and he was always a bit behind on development checks that nursery and HV would point out, but never quite far enough for a referral - when we had our 27 month Health Visitor check she asked to see him again in two months time as she had some development concerns - at the time he was going through a massive shy patch and wouldn’t look anyone in the eye, would limit any interaction with anyone he wasn’t very comfortable with, was awful at sharing, limited play with other kids (was interested in them but not really playing) and almost no back and forth with conversation, if you talked to him he would often ignore you and play with his toys. But then he got to around 2 years and 4 months and his development just exploded. He is now almost 2 years and 8 months and he is speaking in full sentences, chatting back and forth, playing with other kids and telling us about them when he gets home, super interactive with most people - but not overly familiar. All our family and nursery have commented on how his speech and social skills have come on leaps and bounds in such a short period of time. He has started talking about his emotions - it’s really lovely to see after so much worry. It’s strange to think only 4 months ago I was so worried.

@FromWalesAndBackAgain Wow, such a amazing progress, I hope that will be same result for us :). For the last six months, I've been worried about his development all the time (If I compered him with peers). But there some days I am down (because he do not listen to me and have bad mood) and there are days when he surprises me.

@Needer8954 i can completely empathise - my nephew is a very similar age to my son, and I made myself so upset comparing the two constantly and feeling like my nephew was so far ahead but couldn’t talk to my sister about it. So I can completely get it, but some kids do have a steady development progression and some kids have leaps and stalls and I think my son falls into the latter! Not good for a worrying brain haha, but he is doing so well now and I have no development concerns - just general concerns of a toddler mum 😂😂

@Boymama2705 Hello, some update after 2 months?

Hi, just wondering if there has been any updates with your little ones? My little boy is 22 months and we are in a similar situation. He does not have any speech yet, just some babbling. We do feel like he understands quite a lot but it only seems to be when he’s at home in an environment he’s familiar with, which is probably quite normal. He also has limited gestures and only seems to use them when he wants. He does follow actions for songs, he claps and waves (occasionally) and the past 2 weeks we are getting some pointing to objects, but doesn’t seem to be with index finger, it’s more a pointing down and knuckles facing the objects he wants. He’s doesn’t attend nursery as we are fortunate to have grandparents that are retired but I have signed him up to start in April when he turns 2. I can’t comment how social he is with other children as he’s not around others enough to get a good picture of this. We have been in touch with HV, and they have referred him to a local hub that focuses on speech and communication, however we haven’t heard anything back from that and are tempted to go private with SALT. We get all the obvious comments from friends and family that he’s still only young, he’s a boy, boys are lazy etc and I feel like we’ve been waiting for an explosion of speech but it just doesn’t seem to be coming and now we are concerned.

@MamaReeves Hello, not OP but commented here. So my son is almost 2y3m. After 2y he start learning fast, now he know whole alphabet (can say and recognize every letter) numbers up to 12, basic colors and can point out lots of items and say them with bad pronunciation (vehicles, vegies, animals, fruits etc.) all of that he learned after 2y. at 24m he had about 25 words/sounds/gestures now have about maybe 100+ and we have some 2-3 words phrases (for example where is ball, here is car, this is duck, bye bye dada) so still behind with speech but at least some progress.