DD says she is "scared" of the dentist - need help please!!

[Flamesparrow]

Yes, I know I am a bad bad mother, she is nearly 5 and hasn't been to the dentist in 18 months - 2 years

The first appointment she covered her mouth with her hands, I didn't have enough hands to peel both of hers away and prize open her mouth, and tbh I didn't feel that a 3 yr old should be forced like that and that it would do more damage than good.

Anyway, her next check up we missed through my stupidity (thought it was the same day as mine... was the day before), the replacement appointment was missed because DS was frighteningly ill and I forgot it in the chaos. 2 strikes and you're out so she was left dentist-less.

School dental check came... they lost her form and said she didn't have permission

I have finally got off my arse and booked her in to see one, but she is sobbing saying she is scared.

She is ?AS so I have told her today ready to prepare her and give her notice for Thursday.

I have told her that they just want to see her teeth, make sure they are all there. She's havin none of it.

I can't take her to my own appointments because my own teeth are so terrible that I invariably need work and that will terrify her. Plus she clings to me when we go to new places so it will be a case of having her laying on me as they try and look in my mouth.

Please help me work out how to get her to open her mouth on Thursday!!! I am already working with bribery (Ben10 stickers), but she is stubborn and if she ain't doin it, then no stickers in the world will change her mind

I am desperately worried that she will end up with teeth like mine

I tell mine that the dentist just wants to count them and offer them a mini hot chocolate at the cafe as bribery!

Maybe get her to count them herself first and then say the dentist wants to check and that there is a prize if she gets it right.

One of mine is terrified - the other loves it! Our dentist gives them tooth shaped rubbers and stickers as a reward - but there was ahuge falling out last year when he gave the good one a Cars mug and the scared one a tooth shaped rubber - he went beserk!

I need inserts to boost my fuzzis btw - so will hunt down your website!

My DS had to have loads of dental work (despite my best efforts)and was freaked out at a really early age by a barbarous dentist.(Extraction under local anaesthetic at 4 yrs old!)
I spoke to our new dentist and explained DS' worries and fears before I took him to the surgery and she's been excellent. She's taken it really steady with him. 1st visit she showed him all around the surgery, let him make the 'magic chair' go up and down etc and made no attempt to look in his mouth. 2nd visit got him to ride up and down in 'magic chair' showed him the little mirror on a stick and how he could see Mummy's teeth etc. 3rd visit, he opened his mouth and let her count his teeth. He has now had one filling (with a special reward afterwards) and happily goes to the dentist every three months! (extra check ups for dire teeth!)

ask dentist if you can take her to have a look round first - maybe take photos of the chair

then show her how you lie back and open yuoru mouth so dentist can see and let her see too

then go away and practice games of how wide can oyu open yoru mouth
then try agian

you need to call the dnetist to ask if they can help with this

You can buy basic dentist's tools in Boots - by which I mean the little mirror and a tooth picky thing. I would take her to Boots and choose them together, along with a new toothbrush and paste, and go home and let her 'examine' your teeth, her dad's, granny's etc. ANyone willing!

And asking the dentist to show her around is a good idea.

I think for the first appointment you need for her to just go in the room and look around

mine played on the 'magic' chair that went up and down

I lay on the chair and then sat on my knee at first

looked at the mirror and bright light, played with the tap where you swoosh your mouth etc etc

then build up ffrom there

what about a book about going to the dentist?

Yes - I work for a dentist, and believe me they are WELL used to kids who are nervous with them, and they have all sorts of tricks up their sleeves to gain their confidence! If its REALLY bad she can even be referred to a specialist. But she really has to go!

Thank you!!! Loads to try Including changing dentist it seems - have spoken to my mum and she says I have chosen one well known for being terrible with children

My dd has a terrible fear of the dentist. She had a horrible experience with the first one and has never gotten over it.

I try and arrange a treat for after the appointment. If she has teeth pulled, the tooth fairy buys a toy sometimes...