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Adult cat and baby

4 replies

chlo299 · 04/01/2024 21:07

Hi all x I am hoping someone could relate with their story and help me out x I'm pregnant with my first baby due in April and I will need to take care of my mums adult cat from September. I am worried how the adult cat will cope with the baby 😩 and I'm stressing so much. Has anyone been in this situation? How did you approach this introduction? Many thanks 💖

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Scirocco · 04/01/2024 22:18

Hi, my DC and our cats have got on very well - they each have had their own relationships develop and it's been lovely to watch. Our cats were 14 when DC was born.

Cat 1's initial reaction was "this is terrible". He spent a week hiding under the sofa and only coming out when he knew DC and I weren't around (I knew he'd be ok - this is just what he does when new people or animals arrive). He got lots of attention from DH though. Then, one day he just decided that he loves DC and they've been really close ever since. One of DC's first words was 'Kitty'. It helps that Cat 1 is pretty chilled and doesn't respond aggressively to pretty much anything. We're still vigilant of course.

Cat 2 (now deceased - not DC's fault!) was confused. Her main hobby in life was hunting and suddenly there was a small hairless screaming life-form that made weird smells that she wasn't allowed to hunt. We were clear and consistent that DC was not food, and once DC was mobile they got on really well because they both enjoyed chasing each other around the flat. It also turned out that Cat 2 had been eating a lot of DC's vegetables, which we discovered when Cat 2 died and DC had to look for new ways to hide unwanted food.

Our situation was slightly different in that the cats were here before the baby, but some things we found and find helpful have been...

Cats get stressed easily and a stressed cat can be more likely to lash out or behave unpredictably. We did gradual introductions with lots of praise for the cats, making sure they could easily leave the area and had access to hiding places.

Feliway is great. We don't have it on all the time, but used it at times of higher stress.

Never give cat and baby unsupervised access to each other. Neither will be particularly good at responding helpfully to the other, especially at first. If you're with them, try to be in a position where you can quickly intervene or sit between them.

No overnight access to each other because that can't be supervised when you're asleep.

Lots and lots of praise for cats and DC for every interaction.

I'd suggest getting familiar with the cat in advance and considering their personality, preferences and history. The more you know, the better you'll be at picking up on their early cues.

chlo299 · 05/01/2024 04:36

@Scirocco amazing thank you x and sorry for yourcat 2 loss 🙁 we've had the cat with us for 3 weeks over Christmas as mum was away and I was surprised how well she got on in our house quickly it was like a totally different cat 😊 so at least I know that she will get on fine with the new place she actually didn't want to leave and we were both crying 😂

Would you suggest to have the cat before the baby's born already in the house or bring her over later on ?

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Scirocco · 05/01/2024 04:49

Is the cat comfortable with staying away from its main home? If so, that could be a useful way of identifying preferred safe spaces and sleeping habits. It could be quite dependent upon the cat's ability to cope with changes of environment.

Another thing you could do is, in the time between your baby being born and the cat moving in, give the cat things with the baby's scent on it (things like muslin squares could be good) so that their smell becomes associated with non-threatening things.

chlo299 · 05/01/2024 10:00

@Scirocco funny enough she actually seemed more comfortable at our place than her home of 13yrs 😅 so that's a good sign I guess. She's never been around children though :( I'd rather wait to get her in after the baby is 4months ish as I can see myself stressing so much in the first 4months that I need to monitor the baby as well as the cat 24/7

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